Oy my little yiddisher pickel

"I miss you ricpic."
"You never come around anymore. You don't write me poems the way you used to when we were keeping company."
"Remember when we lived side by side in Brownstones in Crown Heights. With your friend the Crack Emcee."
"Those were the days."

Oy my little yiddisher pickel,

"Oy why do you make me dress up in my french maid's outfit ricpic?"
"What would Rabbi Glickstein think if he knew?"
"Of course he makes me dress up like a cossack."
"I will never do this again if my name isn't Molly Picon!"

Oy my little yiddisher pickel

"Ripic I am gonna knock you on your keister."
"Where have you been. You haven't writtin me a poem in months."
"What so you are occupying Hester Street?"
"Don't make me come through the time machine and knock you out."

Oy my little yiddisher pickel!

"What ricpic you have forgotten me so soon."

"Never my little babtka. You will always be my little Geschmak dumpling. You always only you."

"But you said you avoided a stroke....and I know you have been taken a few strokes looking at my photo's on the internets you Fachadick Shmeckle!"

"Please baby don't get angry you know I love you."

"Well here's something to remember me by you shmuck.....never had a stroke, HA!"

Oy my little yiddisher pickel,

"So did you bring the pickel like I asked ricpic."
"Yes I did Rocky. Just like you asked....sweet and sour... it's the best you will ever put in your mouth."
"What you call this a pickel? It ain't even a gerkin. You must be crazy. I mean this time traveling bullshit was bad enough but you call that a pickel. You must be meshugenah you shemdrake. Oy."
"Another shiska bitch. I should have shot for 1975."

Oy my little yiddisher pickel

"I am waiting ricpic. Where are you?"
"I will be there soon bubbe. Wait for me."
"But you left me. You said you were a time traveler. Could that be true?"
"Of coures it is true my little latke."
"Would you like to pet my puppy?"
" I think you are confused my little Baba Ghanoush. You have the wrong one to be petted."
"What you want to pet my pussy? I don't think so schmuck. Go look for your goyisher whores."
"Oy I better travel back to 1968."

Oy my little yiddisher pickel

"I have a telegram for you Miss Picon."
"Why thank you boobie. What a nice young boy. What's your name?"
"Why it's ricpic."
"Nice to meet you. Com'om let's dance my little yiddesher pickel. Let's Dance!"

The return of the monkey!

"Doctor, what is your strange obsession with this monkey?"
"Don't you anything, this Molly Picon's monkey. They live along time. He is ninety six years old"
"My goodness, it looks like he has an erection."
"Why of course he does, the stories this ape could tell."
"Well are we going to conduct tests."
"No I am afraid we cannot. We can only test it's health, but it seems it was willed to a young professor in Wisconsin."

Where is my monkey?

What? You think flowers are enough Shmuel.Don't be a smuck. Where the hell is my monkey?