What you lookin' at

I tried to enjoy myself today reading my kindle. The first inkling well duckling that something was up was when this big fat black duck swam by.

I knew something was up. You can't trust ducks. Especially the black ones. Just sayn'

Next thing you know we are having a beef.

He couldn't take it the bitch. He had to go and his crew and come back to try to intimidate me. But it didn't work.

He was a persistent bastard. He had to go out to get reinforcements.  They like to travel in packs. Or gaggles or whatever. But I don't care.

I just wanted to read my freaking kindle.

The ducks are happy!

Last year I bid and won on a bucket of port. Six bottles of premium port in different flavors. They think I am going to do the same thing this year.

The little bastards got drunk out of their faces.

And when I complained?

They told me to put it on their bill.

The Duckling Episode on Louie is great.

You should check the finale of Louie on FX this weekend.

It is an hour long story recreating his trip with the USO to Iraq and Afghanistan. He ends up taking along a duckling as you can see in the video I posted below.

It is a great episode and really seems to show how the guys are doing in the combat zone. I think you really will enjoy it.

Highly recommended.

Thanks to the bunch of ducks who comment here keeping it going while I was away.

All you ducks chatting away on the comments while I was away it is really appreciated.

By the way the duck smelling the other ducks ass?

Titus.

Get those Ducks in a Row!

Where the Duck are you?

We stopped by a duck farm on our way to pick up lunch today. Thousands of duck quacking and crapping and running around. It was quite a sight.

Then we went into Riverhead to this old school Polish Deli and got some great stuffed cabbage, perogies, meatballs, kielbasa and other goodies. We brought them back to the B&B and had a great lunch.

By the way when you get a bunch of ducks in one place it really smells bad. Just sayn'

The ducks are not in a row....besides they are swans anyway

Last night we sat at the edge of the water in four wooden chairs to look at the water and the sun set. So who comes swimming along but four swans.

There was the big Momma Swan and the three little swans. Just like our ducks.

We ran to get a camera and take photos. They didn't stay in line but they still were very cute.

We took this as a good omen.

Don't Duck doing the Dishes.

We were real busy today. Lots of stuff to do and no time to hang on the internet today.

We also entertained tonight and had some friends over. I made some appetizers. Prosciutto and melon. Fresh Mozzarella, Basil and Tomato. Olives, Manchego, Fontina and Grapes. Then we went around the corner to the Thai place and brought back some of the appetizers they make. Spring rolls, Veggie Dumplings and Chicken Sate.

We had a lot of fun laughing and eating and drinking.

I let the ducks clean up.

The Duck Pack is Back.

The Ducks love the Ratpack lifestyle. They are always stealing my cigars and scotch. They can get pretty rowdy when they decide it is time to party.

There is nothing worse than a fucked up duck.

For the Roses

The Ducks helped clean the backyard yesterday and were enjoying the roses we clipped and put thoughout the house.

The ducks won't take off their glasses?

They loved Thor in 3D but they don't want to take off the glasses. Plus they quacked through the whole movie. I hate when they do that.

You can't trust a duck!

As soon as I got home tonight, I saw that the mama duck had already broken open the port and made herself a snack.

I have to get a lock for the liquor cabinet.

The dick was happy too!

Hey I liked the port wine basket too!

What's crazy about a charity auction is the value of the prizes. They were all donated and sold for the higgest bid. This bucket of port was worth about $500 but my bid was only $110. Luckily I donated more to cover it but still what a bargin.

Now I will keep them in the back of the store to break out with cheese and grapes and bread when the husbands are waiting in the back room while the wives shop.

I just have to keep it away from the ducks. Those little drunken bastards.

The ducks were happy!

They loved the basket of port we won the bid on!

The little drunken bastards!

The Ducks are hungry!

So we got Thai. They hate take out but you can't bring them to the restaurant. It sounds like they are farting all the time.

Yes that's right. That was them. That's my story and I am sticking to it.

Clean up in aisle seven.....

Somebody spilled something when they dumped a big package into the ocean.

They call it splash back. So to speak.

Dry your ducks!

Sometimes your duck gets wet.

So you need to dry out.

So to speak.

A ducken perspective!

A ducken perspective!

The wife set them up in my slippers. She said they could never fill my shoes. Or my slippers so to speak.

But to give you a size perspective that is a size 14 slipper.

What the duck?

You Drunken Duck!

So the new game is to set the ducks up before the other person can see them. At least for now. The plan is to eventually take them to the store and put names on them. Then they will go in order of who sells the most. You know as a motivational tool so to speak.

What the duck? It might work.

Anyhoo I got them drunk.

Where the duck R U?

The last couple of days have been rough. I had to be at the store at the crack of dawn to open up for the painters. The only consolation is that we get to leave early.

On Tuesday as we went home we passed the antique store on the corner of 2nd Place and the wife fell in love with these concrete ducks that he had for sale. They were lawn ornaments and heavy as shit as they are made out of cement.

Now the ducks are funny because of a joke we have about the store. You see we have a new employee who is very young but likes to imitate the wife. So much so that I have to tease her. Then when cousin Katy (you remember the elf) came into work there were some ruffled feathers. I told her it was like the ducks. When the mama duck comes out of the water all the baby ducks fight to be the first duck following behind her. Katy insists she is first duck. I say you have to earn it.

So of course I had to go buy them to surprise her and put them on the kitchen floor to find as we came home that night.

She loves them.

She loves them so much they she set up a twitter account called "Where the duck R U" to chronicle all the places the ducks go.