Forcas: Will you be interviewing any new announcers my dread Lord.
Lucifer: Yeah we might as well give it a shot. I am pretty fucking bored pulling the fly's off of Bo Belinsky. Who do we have in the last bus?
Forcas: Well we have several people that will be coming in. We have a couple of those Tornado chasers assholes who needlessly get in the way of rescue workers.
Lucifer: Yeah we might as well give it a shot. I am pretty fucking bored pulling the fly's off of Bo Belinsky. Who do we have in the last bus?
Forcas: Well we have several people that will be coming in. We have a couple of those Tornado chasers assholes who needlessly get in the way of rescue workers.
Lucifer: No those
science guys are boring. Who wants to hear about their barometer falling. What
else you got.
Forcas: Well we have
the beloved star of a seventies sitcom.
Lucifer: Holy shit! You
mean Sally Struthers is finally here? I can't wait to feed her living flesh to
starving moolies. I have to get her back for those fucking commercials that
curly haired cunt.
Forcas: No not her either. It is her mother Edith Bunker also know as Jean Stapleton.
Forcas: No not her either. It is her mother Edith Bunker also know as Jean Stapleton.
Lucifer: Holy Shit. I can't fuckin' wait. Shove her in Forcas!
Forcas: Right away Sire!
Jean Stapleton: (slides down the stairwell to hell and tumbles at the feet of Satan and his right hand fallen angel Forcas, she groans and rubs her vagina) What’s going on here? One minute I was walking to a bright light and met a man in a robe with a clipboard and the next thing I know a trap door opens and I am roasting my tootsies off.
Forcas: Right away Sire!
Jean Stapleton: (slides down the stairwell to hell and tumbles at the feet of Satan and his right hand fallen angel Forcas, she groans and rubs her vagina) What’s going on here? One minute I was walking to a bright light and met a man in a robe with a clipboard and the next thing I know a trap door opens and I am roasting my tootsies off.
Lucifer: Welcome to hell bitch. Boy do I have a lot of good shit
planned for you!
Jean Stapleton: Wait a minute! This can't be right. I was a beloved figure
because I played Edith Bunker who was like everybody's Mom. Why am I in hell?
Lucifer: Tough shit baby. You are here on the Norman Lear Protocol. Anybody
that starred in one of those commie sitcom has to burn in hell for all
eternity. Plus you committed a big faux paw baby that the Big guy will never
forgive.
Jean
Stapleton: What could I possibly have done?
Lucifer: Why you starred in the orignial company of "Damn
Yankees!" Don't you know that God is a big time Yankee fan? Anybody that
disses the Bronx Bombers or causes them
problems comes straight to the hot seat. Forcas get her ass out of here she is
annoying me.
Forcas: Yes Sire. (Two burley demons grab Jean and drag her away as she protests feebly that she is a serious actress and a liberated woman and everybody loves her and she couldn't be treated this way)
Lucifer: What a maroon. Foras send her to sitcom hell with Fred Mertz and Freddie Prince and Bonnie Franklin. Strip her naked and tie her in a 69 with Maude. They can carpet munch through all eternity. Except that Bea Arthur might like that. Have Liberace cornhole while she is doing that. That should cover all the bases.
Forcas: Very well my lord. Who will we have announcing today?
Lucifer: I don't know. I guess I have to wait until Bob Gamere or Bob Costas shows up to get a real announcer. Hurry up and finish up so we can watch some TV. I just got Net Flicks and I want to check out some flicks.
Forcas: Yes Sire. (Two burley demons grab Jean and drag her away as she protests feebly that she is a serious actress and a liberated woman and everybody loves her and she couldn't be treated this way)
Lucifer: What a maroon. Foras send her to sitcom hell with Fred Mertz and Freddie Prince and Bonnie Franklin. Strip her naked and tie her in a 69 with Maude. They can carpet munch through all eternity. Except that Bea Arthur might like that. Have Liberace cornhole while she is doing that. That should cover all the bases.
Forcas: Very well my lord. Who will we have announcing today?
Lucifer: I don't know. I guess I have to wait until Bob Gamere or Bob Costas shows up to get a real announcer. Hurry up and finish up so we can watch some TV. I just got Net Flicks and I want to check out some flicks.
13 comments:
I have discovered to my great surprise that some law professors think that this hag could sing.
I do love that picture of Jean Stapleton with Alice Cooper...
You're palming her off on Norman Lear? The Dingbat deserves Hell on her own merit. No one that cloyingly sweet (and dead wrong) goes to heaven. Well, not in a just world anyway.
Hi Everyone! How are you? I am Super, thanks for asking.
Mom made it through surgery. I of course was magnificent as Nurst Ratchet the entire week, waiting on her big time.
My dad loved All In The Family. I noticed as a little fag that Edith sometimes had pointy tits. TITS!. tits.
Sally Struthers performs at the Ogunquit Playhouse every summer. Rue, from Golden Girls was there many summers too. After their shows they would go to The Front Porch in Ogunquit and sing show tunes with all the fags. How depressing, what a letdown. Having successful tele shows and at the end of their life performing for fags in a small town theater in Maine.
I didn't jerky jerky the entire time I was in Wisconsin. I got to Boston and it was like 95 and went to the beach and saw a million hot bodes and ended up jerky jerkying in my car while looking at the hot Brazil guys playing volleyball.
Ishnala Supper Club is very nice-I have been there in the past but it is very expensive.
tits and thanks.
Where is Mamam?
There's a WI supper club called "Inshallah"?
Sharia is making deeper inroads than I thought.
Titus said...
He can't propose a "sulllivanist" though.
That would drive Chick Wimp crazy and his head would explode.
No Sullivanist, ChickWimp will blow a gasket with a Sullivanist.
ChickWimp loves utitlizing anything "Sullivanist" though.
Chick wimp, please get a grip hug your children and move beyond everything Sullivan.
Yes, he devastated you because of his outrageous about turn but get over it MARY.
You sound a little paranoid.....chickwimp.
And as always thanks.
tits.
6/3/13, 11:28 PM
Did you catch it from Sullivan, Titus? Is that the reason for the protection?
@Titus: Just to clarify: Darrell Issa is my Congressman. Often, he is the only positive choice on an otherwise dismal statewide ballot. That was the basis or backstory for my rant on Althouse. For Sullivan to have piled on him the way he did (very much like the way he butt smeared Palin) is starting to strike too close to home. But after seeing the tweet for Plouffe I see that Sullivan is just follower anyways.
You have been a cheerleader and supporter of Sullivan over the years, probably out of some friendship or Harvard loyalty as best I can tell. That is the basis for the enmity I feel towards you.
Titus, I'd be willing to bet the ranch that Sally and Rue were pleased as punch to be working at the one thing they knew and barely gave a thought to "how the mighty have fallen." I'm not even gonna try to splain. Twenty years from now you'll understand...probably.
You have been a cheerleader and supporter of Sullivan over the years, probably out of some friendship or Harvard loyalty
Titus probably has fond memories of his ten minute love affair w/ old Milky Loads among the Cape Cod dunes.
I'm not even gonna try to splain.
Someone who has to keep one eye on the pot and the t'other up the chimney with a Bow-wow-wow, Fal-lal the dow-a-diddy Bow-wow-wow, and no gasket blowing while tending the home fires with mom, who then drags back a head about to explode which requires sights from afar in the car to complete the herky jerky in Boston, wouldn't get it anyway.
Chip S. said...
There's a WI supper club called "Inshallah"?
Sharia is making deeper inroads than I thought.
June 3, 2013 at 10:54 PM
So long as they serve Brandy Old Fashions, freedom will survive!
I did not realize Titus was such a Sully-fan. Although I should not be surprised. Meade is a big Sully-fan too.
The Norman Lear ticket to Hell. Certainly, Rob Reiner, Struthers, Jack Albertson, Mackenzie Phillips, and Bonnie Franklin deserve a place in hell.
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