What would give you a splinter in your twat?

Woody was always part of the avant garde in Toon Town. He used to come with his latest co-star to parties at Mickey Mouse's house and throw his car keys on to the table and swap with the other cartoon couples. He banged them all. Minnie Mouse. Penelope Pittstop. Velma. Olive Oyl. He even had a tree way with Ariel and Namor the Submariner. He was a nebbishy little dude but he was a goer. Sensation was everything for him. He was always looking for something new and excite.

He was the first cartoon character to put cocaine on his cock. It drove Betty Boop insane when he did her that way. But it was never enough. He always had to try something new.

One day he was sitting around with Bluto and Barney Rubble and they were smoking opium and talking about how bored they were. Woody was just idly pecking away at the wall to pass the time. He was paying attention. But eventually he made a pretty big whole. What he didn't know was that there was a bathroom on the other side. Even in their befuddled state the three cartoon horn dogs realized something.

Woody had invented the glory hole.

(Walter Lantz, The E True Hollywood Story of Woody Woodpecker)