"Where is your Mom son?"
"She is inside officer but I called the police."
"You did. Why?"
"It's my girlfriend. She won't talk to me anymore. And she is cheating on me. I think she joined a cult."
"Are your sure son. Maybe it is because you are a Negro."
"That can't be it. She is too! This is 1968 you don't think I can date a white chick do you?
Damn you are dumb son."
"Calm down son don't get all agitated."
"Don't tell me to calm down you honky motherfucker! You better leave know or I am gonna give you the Macho Response!"
"Here's a tip for you son. Nobody cares. Now why don't you go inside and watch some TV."
"Jive ass turkey."
"Now cut that out. This isn't Starsky and Hutch. Let's go Jim."
17 comments:
Too meta!!!
I think he preferred The Mod Squad.
Did any of you hear the tape recordings of the kid from Syracuse and the coach's wife?
Wow.
She knew it was happening.
And she fucked the kid too.
Are you bummed about Barney Frank, Titus?
OT-
http://www.tocatchadouchebag.com/
When I worked for the NYC Welfare Department, which called itself the Department of Social services but was the Welfare Department, I had a black supervisor who called me turkey all the time and get this, I was so green, so naive, so wet behind the ears back then that I didn't know I was being insulted daily. I just thought that was my office nickname -- turkey. The point? There is no point. I'd like to go back and rip the #%@&# head off. But it's too late. Ya see? first it's too early and then it's too late. That's the point.
Barney Frank lifts his left ass cheek before he farts. Very dainty.
Chick, I am like the honey badger, I don't give a shit he resigned.
I think there should be terms limits.
You worked for the government Ricpic?
Wow.
first it's too early and then it's too late. That's the point.
MamaM's idea of an ideal afterlife involves a place where shit eventually works. Not the absence of negatives necessarily, but an assurance stronger than hope that greater good will eventually result. Order out of chaos, light out of darkness. A big burst of goodness, something more than the tiny glimmers that show up every now and then at the midpoint between too early and too late.
When TY's mushrooms turn out nearly perfect, and the weird stuff Titus pinches is changed from loaves into bread, and woodpeckers on a sliver screen invite laughter; hope increases.
Titus not giving a shit is another story altogether.
Titus not giving a shit is another story altogether.
So true. Since when has Titus not given a shit? This is either abject denial or poor word choice.
In other news I saw on Twitter how a comedian named "Titus" had threatened Sarah Palin with death. No matter what your politics, I thought this in poor taste: 3rd from last paragraph.
I mean, when was Sarah Palin ever mean to gays? Sure people made shit up about her, but it was all invented.
Sarah Palin is fabulous.
I have something to admit fellow republicans.
I actually had this guy come to my fab loft and I feel awful.
I realized 5 minutes into it I was not into him and ended up falling asleep with the rare clumber.
When I awoke he was jerking off to porno on my fab MacBook.
And worst of all he had used up all of my really expensive facial toner I purchased from Barney's for lube.
He was really hot and 21 and I was kind of proud of myself for still being able to pull in a 21 year old hottie.
The facial toner cost like $200.00 for the bottle and he used the entire bottle up for lube. He told me he didn't want to wake me but couldn't find any other lotion or lube in the house.
I was devastated, as you can imagine. He was like can you drive me back to Dorchester and I was like hell no the t is 5 minutes away bitch.
It was awful.
I was walking the rare clumber today and some guy said he must be a real chick magnet.
I was like, what? He was like do you bag a lot of chicks with that dog.
He told me I could actually rent the dog out to straightys and they could walk around and get chicks with him.
I was like how dare you sir.
I told my husband about this and he said did he actually see you before saying that? Like I look like some poofie.
I was devastated.
Gotta wean myself from the disconsolate pacifier of Trooper York.
Console yourself Titus. Maybe the hot hub's memory of your fabness is no longer servicing him.
Gotta wean myself ...
At T-day +4 and counting, cold turkey is not the way to go.
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