Half a face girl gets a free ride!

So they had the eliminations on American Idol last night. They went through the bullshit where they put them in three different rooms and then tell the whole room if they are in or out. Which is kind of silly if you are in room three and you hear the other two rooms break out in screams and stuff. You have to figure your ass is out of there.

Plus what if you are in a room with a bunch of shitty singers. You have to figure you time is up. But if you are in the room with the ones that they are pimping you should be good to go.

Now thank God that they got rid of the older rocker chick named Mary who looked like Squigy from Laverne and Shirley. I mean she was a full out bitch who totally screwed up group week with her shenanigans. She reminded me of the biker nurse from a couple of seasons ago who couldn't sing but they put her for demographics or some shit. I guess the meth addict demo is really big or something.

Now the premise is that they took the other two roomfuls of pasty's and walked them down into the hall one at a time to decide their fate. It is a long and time consuming walk that is just a time waster. But I guess they wanted to save money during the Winter Olympics and shit.

The first guy is this big burly personal trainer called "Big Mike." He seems pretty talented and can even play the guitar. He gets the news and runs to give a bear hug to all the judges. Ellen says "Please don't pick me up." Now I bet she says that to all the guys. Not that there's anything wrong with that. He picks her up anyway and then drops her but unfortunately not on her head. He picks up Karla which usually only takes a dirty martini and a room key at the Beverly Wilshire. One in the books.

Now there is this skinny white dude with long hair who had been in an auto accident who Karla made strip at his audition. She is acting all hot and bothered with this guy and you have to wonder what she is thinking. Didn't she learn anything about this after what Paula went through with the dude who had a web site and video and shit about how he banged her. I mean seriously, is sexual harassment a good thing? I mean sure if you are a Democratic President you can skate but the position of American Idol Judge is way more prestigious don't ya think?

They take this skinny little wimpy high school kid who is this years David Archuletta for the tweener girls who lust after that sort of thing. Oh yeah and for Seacrest. He doesn't have a chance.

They take a couple of nondescript blonds one of whom made it on looks alone like that Meghan hippie chick from last year. They have to have the quota of young hot blonds and they were just filling a slot like a Jewish accountant running for comptroller in 1956 in NYC.

Then there was the biggest ripoff. They put through the half a face girl. I mean they did the whole tragic video thing and that was just the one of her singing "More than a Feeling." I mean she was horrendous. You know when someone gets bad news and their face just collapses. Well with this chick, just think Haiti.

More picks tonight. They need twenty four guys and twenty four girls. It should be interesting.

Or at least more interesting than the fucking luge which is just a guy riding a garbage can lid down a mountain at 90 miles an hour.

(PS that is a picture of the final 24, Hee)