The most famous of all New Orleans Saints was of course the sure handed receiver Danny Abramowicz. Know for both his ability to catch a poorly thrown pass and his love of voodoo, he was traded after his occult practice became common knowledge. To quote his biography (and I am quoting not plagiarizing, ok you assholes so I don’t want to hear it):
“You see Danny has always been a devote Catholic. But living in New Orleans for so long he wandered into a small decrepit Catholic church deep in the Bayou. The priest there was a strange and charismatic man named Father Limba Laveau who led his congregation in a strange amalgam of Voodoo and Catholicism. Danny became a member of the congregation and supported it piously with funds and personal appearances and missionary work that led to the growth of this tiny parish into a significant force in New Orleans in the 1970’s. Danny used several voodoo spells on Tom Fears that led him to be the focus of the Saints offense even though he was slower than a woman working at the New Orleans DMV on an August day when there was no air conditioning. When John Mecom Jr. caught Danny stealing some hairs from his comb and burning them with his Zippo he immediately shipped him to the coast. Ten chickens were killed that night and a curse was put on the New Orleans Saints that lingers to this very day. Never will the Saints be in the Super Bowl. Never will they have the sweet joy of holding the Vince Lombardi trophy in the air. Never will they look into the camera and say “I’m going to Disneyland.” Because you see, the only place they are destined is in fact the only place hotter and more uncomfortable than NOLA.”
(Reverse the Call on the Field, The Secret History of the NFL, Doris Kearns Goodwin, ESPN Press 2010)
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