Saturday, April 6, 2013

Carroll Gardens Vignette


So my regular UPS guy is on vacation. This is the nighttime guy who picks up the UPS box on the corner. Now you have to pay UPS to get a regular pickup. I prefer to tip the drivers directly so they are motivated to come to my store and get my packages. Or to come to deliver them later if my store is closed when they come early in the morning. For example last week the morning guy was on vacation. These fucking guys are union guys so they get more vacations than fuckin Obama. We decided to close on Monday and we called him to see if there were any packages. He was on vacation but he called the guy who was doing his route and told him to come personally to drop off the packages when he finished his route. Of course I greased that guy and will grease my regular guy when he comes back to work.

The night guy was off and I don't want to put my packages in the box first of all they won't fit. Second of all sometimes they get lost. If I hand it to the guy and he scans it in then and there I have a better chance of it getting to my customer. So I was standing in the doorway and waiting for the UPS driver to ride up.  Then it happens!

I see this half a mo with a pitbull in a pink sweater. The dog stops right on the sidewalk on the side of the store about two feet in from  the curb. The pussified pooch cops a squat right there and pisses all over the sidewalk. Now it is not right in front of the store so I guess I can't technically can't get pissed. I just had to shake my head. This douche couldn't curb his dog in the fuckin street? I mean he had to have it piss right in the sidewalk. The dog finishes her business and they walk away. Then two ladies push their monster strollers through the piss. A woman in a sandal steps in it. A little kid riding one of those Razor Scooters rides right through it. A piss ride. Good deal.

You see smeared dog shit on every sidewalk. These hipster cunts let their dogs shit and piss wherever they want and do not pick it up. I can't get over how bad it has gotten in the last few years. The sense of entitlement that these rat bastards have is unbelievable.

Please refer back to the Rifleman post.

6 comments:

Evi L. Bloggerlady said...

You need to channel some Sixty for shit like this.

Trooper York said...

I know.

But "GET OFF OF MY FUCKIN SIDEWALK" does not translate as well as "GET OFF OF MY LAWN!"

windbag said...

I thought of Sixty today as I felled a maple tree. We planted it about 20 years ago. It was about 15 feet from the house. Didn't seem that close when it was 8 feet tall. I felt manly. Nothing to it. Make a small cut near the bottom and gravity takes it from there.

ricpic said...

Sixty!...Come Back Sixty!


Who was that kid in Shane? I could never stand that kid. But Alan Ladd wasn't half bad.

blake said...

The shit on the streets of our town
Comes in different colors of brown
What I mean can be seen and be found
Take a stroll and look down on the ground

Some times a man can't understand
About Mother Nature's grand plan
I mean, there's chocolate and mocha and tan
Where we sit around or just stand

Some has a slight reddish hue
A dark yellow is quite common, too
There's a rainbow in that residue
Could be witnessed by me and by you

Out of some doggie's behind
Comes a rare and unusual find
It's that chalky white albino kind
It blows and it boggles my mind

The shit on the streets of our town
Comes in different colors of brown
What I mean can be seen and be found
Take a stroll and look down on the ground

blake said...

ricpic--

Brandon Wilde, I believe. One of his last movies was that Paul Newman flick...Hud?