So this time of year sucks. I am always running between appointments to pick up the information to do tax returns and I never have time to sit down and get something to eat. I mean I would like nothing better than to sit in a restaurant or a diner and have a burger or a steak or plate of pasta and some wine. But I just don't have time. So I usually grab something from a cart or a pizza store and eat while I am walking to the next appointment. So what would you guys like to nosh on in between stops?
A nice juicy hot dog with kraut and mustard. I love dirty water dogs from the cart. The dirtier the better. I never get sick from them because I have a cast iron stomach. My wife scieves them because one time we were driving from the West Side highway and saw them loading up the carts from the warehouse before pushing them onto the side streets. And they had all the food on the floor. The street. She freaked. I just thought it gave it flavor.
A knish. Specifically a standard potato knish. Now a maven like ricpic is going to say you need to get the homemade style or maybe a spinach one or some other foolishness. Me, I like a standard one. Split down the middle. With mustard on it. Just like I like my women. Oh shit, too much information.
A standard slice of pizza. No toppings. No Chicago deep dish shit. Not even a Sicilian. Just a regular slice that you grab from the store. Reheated of course. You know I measure the economy from a slice of pizza. When I was a kid in the 1960's a regular slice was a nickel. My mom would give me a quarter for lunch and I could get two slices and a grape soda from the machine. Now pizza is $2.50 a slice.
Last but not least, an ice cream cone for you guys with a sweet tooth. Not as filling as our other choices. And I must admit in Manhattan in the summer there is a Taystee Freeze truck just about every three blocks. Just long enough in between for me to finish a cone. So I really mean about three or four cones. But you get what I mean. Plus now I can post a lot of pictures of hot chicks licking cones. Sweet.
Anyway, those are your choices. What do you want to chow down on dudes and dudettes?
24 comments:
A nickel?
Geez, that '60s/'70s inflation changed everything, didn't it?
You bet it did. A loaf of bread was a nickel. If you want a movie eqivalent watch Yours, Mine and Ours with Henry Fonda and Lucille Ball. They are in the supermarket and are pushing three huge carts with tons and tons of stuff. And I think the bill came out to like fifty bucks or something. To see it is to weep bitter tears.
I am afraid that this is like "Life on Mars" and I got conked on the head and we just went back to 1976.
Taxes. Troop, if you've been caught once are you on a list from then on? Mr. X asked me to ask you. Okay, I cheated and they caught it. Does that make me forever a target, more of a target than the other fishies?
I have my secret decoder ring if the answer is cryptic.
Not if you don't try the same trick. Most returns are pretty straight forward. Anything estoric stands out like a sore thumb. It might fly for years but once they question it and you don't have the answers they want to hear, well don't do that again. But by and large they don't compare one year to another. There are just too many returns.
Thanks for the answer. You're probably miffed that I asked. What can I tellya, no class, that's me. I'm itchin' to get into specifics but I'm gonna be good...only to say I didn't try anything tricky because frankly my return is too simple for that. I just underreported the income shown on a single 1099. Now what's so bad about that? Hee hee.
Hey that was a simple mistake. A crooked accountant would say that you should always report all of the income on your 1099's but be more creative in the deductions you put against it. But that would be wrong.
You should pay every single dollar you owe so President Obama can spend it wisely. So help me God.
But I really want you to wax poetic on the knish.
But I really want you to wax poetic on the knish.
Me, too. I'm hungry.
Eddie G. sat beneath a ratty palm tree pissed off but not so pissed off that he couldn't nosh a knish --
"I'm your Moses, but nooo those studio yids had to play it safe with that big blonde Heston goyishe."
I told my accountant that I like to start at the bottom of the form, and work my way up. He looked at me kinda funny.
Forget about bread, what about dope? We used to get a big old 4 finger lid for a double sawbuck.
Now you get like 2 small bones.
And would a fucking Democrat President do what needs to be done about it? Not bloody likely. Not if there's nothing in it for him and the other ratons. Depressing.
Geez, ricpic, I thought you were a patriot.
My patriotism starts to ebb at the approach of insolvency. Gummint mandated insolvency, that is.
Aw, come one! What do you think the man meant when he said "I regret that I have only one life to give to my country"?
He meant he wished he could work his whole life, give everything to the government, and even more!
ricpic, that was worth waiting for! ;-)
And uh...well, some of us have also been known to be a little creative in the tax department. *shrugs*
Nothing is more patriotic than not paying taxes. That the whole reason we have this country. Because we didn't want to pay freakin' taxes.
Troop--
You're not saying Unca Joe lied to me, are ya?
Hey, no burger choice? This really really smacks of snackism. Or is it snacks of smackism?
But Bushman, there are no burger carts. The premise is it is stuff you are grabbing on the fly. Even the pizza you buy standing outside on the street because they have a little window you go up to order a slice.
I'd grab a cone. Who wants pizza, knish or hot dog breath when visiting a client?
Add your own joke here.
A quick fish taco while heading to visit a client would be good, but that's not in the poll.
You only want fish taco on your breath when you are visiting your female clients.
I can't decide! The wienies sound disgusting (thanks for that tip, Troop, lol) and pizza has to be good pizza for me to bother. That leaves the knish and the cone.
And I do really like ricpic's poetry...hmmm.
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