Friday, February 13, 2009

Tales of Amy's Garden


Fiver: There's something very queer about the warren this evening
Hazel: Is it dangerous?
Fiver: It's not exactly danger, it's... oh, I don't know. Something oppressive... like thunder.
Bigwig: I know what it is. It is the lady in garden. She is blotting out the sun.
Hazel: What does that mean? Isn’t she very thin? I know she hates chubby people. She once hit that nice milk maid with an umbrella when she tried to sell her some butter.
Fiver: I have noticed it too. She is hanging out over the warren and blocking the sunlight. Watching everything we do.
Bigwig: Yes I have seen her put her eyes right at the rabbit hole and look in. And sometimes she yells at the things we are doing down the rabbit hole.
Hazel: What does she want?
Bigwig: I don’t know. I think she wants to play. It’s all so serious over at the cottage. Everyone yelling at each other and calling each other names.
Hazel: Well she can play but she is not a rabbit.
Bigwig: I know. And she keeps calling some of us fat bunnies. She wants us to stop eating and be skinny.
Fiver: What’s the fun in that? Rabbits just like to eat and have sex. And if they aren’t doing that they just like to talk about it.
Bigwig: Well some people want to be more serious.
Hazel: I don’t know about that. But I tell you one thing. She better keep her hands off our carrots.
(Watership Down, 1972)

6 comments:

chickelit said...

Outstanding update!

Michael Haz said...

Closing in on the Courtney Love Lifetime Achievement Award.

jaed said...

Continuing the day's theme:

After and before

The hell of it is that there are plenty of people out there who would say Before-Amy on the right "is a little chubby" and "needs to lose a few pounds". Not really star quality. Losing the battle of the pounds. Gahhh.

(The tattooed eyeliner thing doesn't help with the scariness quotient either. What was this girl thinking? I ask you.)

Bushman of the Kohlrabi said...

She is not a handsome woman.

Hoosier Daddy said...

I'll said it before and I'll say it again. That girl is so nasty she's enough to make a man switch teams.

Hoosier Daddy said...

Not that there's anything wrong with that.