Tuesday, March 31, 2009

I fell like the Boss!!!!


Hey now that we have Simon commenting here, I feel like I have the All Stars from Althouse. I feel like George Steinbrenner. All of the great commenters without any of the idiots.


Now if Mort would only comment we would have our Mickey Rivers.

29 comments:

KCFleming said...

Sure, but can your brain sex multi-task?

Can you drink beer, order food, cop a feel, and laugh loud enough to scare the waitress, all at the same time?

Trooper York said...

My brain? I used to do all that with just my dick.

Trooper York said...

Not to brag or anything. You see do to a terrible zipper accident when I was trying on my first Catholic school uniform I had to have a transplant. But in the early sixities medical science is not what it is now. They were into experimentation at Long Island College Hospital and they actually transplanted an elephants trunk to replace my penis. It worked out great. The only problem is I have to stay away from peanuts. You see the trunk just grabs them and tries to stuff up my ass.

TitusJustFartedanditSmells said...

OK, I am now watching American Idol for the first time and that Anook guy stunk almost as bad as my fart that I just laid.

TitusJustFartedanditSmells said...

How funny about the zipper accident. I tried it on a classmate of mine when I was a little boy and he told me he had a terrible zipper accident too and as a result his hog didn't work.

So we never did it.

OMG, that blonde chick on American Idol is even worse than Anook.

TitusJustFartedanditSmells said...

Meghan, that's her name. Absolutely hideous.

dr kill said...

John McCain's daughter is on TV? WTF does she have to do with dicks or brains?

TitusJustFartedanditSmells said...

I would fuck Meghan Mccain. She isn't bad.

dr kill said...

They say Rock Hudson jeans had the zipper on the posterior aspect.

Not that there's anything wrong with that.

dr kill said...

She's the right age to be one of my spermulated offspring, except she's not smart enough.

dr kill said...

The Bush twins? Definitely. And Biden's daughter? Natch on the snatch. They are all party animals. Multi-tasking party animal sons and daughters of metrosexual limpdicks.

Trooper York said...

Welcome back Titus. We missed you dude.

Peter V. Bella said...

Hey Titus, how was P Town? You missed a lot while you were gone. house finally came out. Yep, he finally got tired of living in the closet. He has admitted to a fondness for farm animals, especially sheep and goats. He even waxes poetic over them.

Anyway, welcome back.

TitusJustFartedanditSmells said...

I don't want HD on my team. You guys can have him.

I have been back from Ptown for a long time. I just went for a weekend to get my timeshare for the summer. I am right on the water in a 700 square feet cottage, not to far from Andrew Sullivan's place.

We are doing an expansion and an acquisition at work so I have been crazy busy.

I would do most all of the Biden women, of course not the little girls but they are some hot women in that family.

You know Jill Biden is wild in the sack. I but she does anal and swallows.

I am watching Ozzie Osbourne now who is back on the tele.

TitusJustFartedanditSmells said...

The Osbourne kids have lost weight.

Michael Haz said...

The Osbourne kids have lost weight.

Mostly from the cranium.

Jason (the commenter) said...

they actually transplanted an elephants trunk to replace my penis.

That reminds me of some excellent body paint I saw once. Oh, when that elephant got mad!

rcocean said...

Simon - Our answer to George Will.

I'm Full of Soup said...

Daryyyl! Darryyyl!

That's for the Mets fans if there are any here.

Peter V. Bella said...

not to far from Andrew Sullivan's place.

Maybe you can stroll by and throw a stink bomb through his window.

KCFleming said...

Man Troop, that reminds me of the wallet made of elephant foreskin. When you rub it, it turns into a suitcase.

Darcy said...

*peeks at comments*

Oh. Guys' thread. 'Night!

Simon said...

Trooper York said...
"Hey now that we have Simon commenting here"

I have always been here.

I'm Full of Soup said...

Typo -I meant to type "stinking" Mets fans.

Peter V. Bella said...

Since Troop wished everyone a happy hdhouse day on Althouse, I thought I would share something from the archives of Broadway musicals.

You're a mean one, hdhouse.
You really are a heel.
You're as cuddly as a cactus,
You're as charming as an eel.
hdhouse.


You're a bad banana
With a greasy black peel.


You're a monster, hdhouse.
Your heart's an empty hole.
Your brain is full of spiders,
You've got garlic in your soul.
hdhouse.


I wouldn't touch you, with a
thirty-nine-and-a-half foot pole.


You're a vile one, hdhouse.
You have termites in your smile.
You have all the tender sweetness
Of a seasick crocodile.
hdhouse.


Given the choice between the two of you
I'd take the seasick crockodile.


You're a foul one, hdhouse.
You're a nasty, wasty skunk.
Your heart is full of unwashed socks
Your soul is full of gunk.
hdhouse.


The three words that best describe you,
are, and I quote: "Stink. Stank. Stunk."


You're a rotter, hdhouse.
You're the king of sinful sots.
Your heart's a dead tomato splot
With moldy purple spots,
hdhouse.


Your soul is an apalling dump heap overflowing
with the most disgraceful assortment of deplorable
rubbish imaginable,
Mangled up in tangled up knots.


You nauseate me, hdhouse.
With a nauseaus super-naus.
You're a crooked jerky jockey
And you drive a crooked horse.
hdhouse.


You're a three decker saurkraut and toadstool
sandwich
With arsenic sauce.

(From the house that stole Lambchop. Lambda productions 2008)

TitusJustFartedanditSmells said...

Darcy don't be afraid of the guys threads.

I do like the guys threads though. They remind me of locker room conversation. Where we let it all hang out.

There are some hot Euro protesters on the tele today. Lots of foreign hog. Do Euros work?

Darcy said...

Aww...thanks, Titus. :)

I do want to comment on Peter's song: Love it!

TitusJustFartedanditSmells said...

I am an Althouse All Star.

I am walking on clouds right now.

What a compliment.

Hugs, Althouse All Stars.

Hugs all around.

I'm Full of Soup said...

Simon:

Have you abandoned Althouse? I have not seen you there lately.