(Family quarters, upstairs at the White House at the breakfast table)Michelle Obama: Hello momma. Hello Auntie Madea. I need some coffee please.
Marian Robinson (Michelle’s mom) Child you look terrible. What’s the matter? Is that no account husband keeping you up all night with his foolishness?
Michelle Obama: Now Mama don’t start, I had to help with the crises.
Marian Robinson: What crises? Did we run out of waffles again?
Michelle Obama: No the crises with the Pirates.
Madea: You having a problem with the Pirates. You know what to do with a Pirate don’t we Marian
Marian Robinson: Damn straight Madea. I remember how you handled it.
Madea: It was back when I was singing back up for Sister Sledge and we were doing the “We are Famileee video.” That nasty boy Manny Sanguillén was all up in my business.
Marian Robinson: Oh I remember girl. He was a horny little devil.
Madea: I tried to let him down easy but then he grabbed my booty and I had to haul off and smack him. And even that didn’t do it. So I had to open a series can of Whoop Ass and let him have it. I hit him so hard I broke his testicles.
Michelle Obama: No you didn’t!
Madea: Yes I did. Broke both his balls. Of course that is why he is know as the best ‘bad ball hitter” in baseball history. And that’s how you handle a Pirate. Tell that skinny ass half a cracker husband of yours. To take care of a Pirate you just hit hard enough to knock his balls off. Simple as that.
Michelle Obama: I will pass it along Auntie.
Marian Robinson: You do that honey. Now have some waffles before that fool wakes up and hogs them all.
Marian Robinson (Michelle’s mom) Child you look terrible. What’s the matter? Is that no account husband keeping you up all night with his foolishness?
Michelle Obama: Now Mama don’t start, I had to help with the crises.
Marian Robinson: What crises? Did we run out of waffles again?
Michelle Obama: No the crises with the Pirates.
Madea: You having a problem with the Pirates. You know what to do with a Pirate don’t we Marian
Marian Robinson: Damn straight Madea. I remember how you handled it.
Madea: It was back when I was singing back up for Sister Sledge and we were doing the “We are Famileee video.” That nasty boy Manny Sanguillén was all up in my business.
Marian Robinson: Oh I remember girl. He was a horny little devil.
Madea: I tried to let him down easy but then he grabbed my booty and I had to haul off and smack him. And even that didn’t do it. So I had to open a series can of Whoop Ass and let him have it. I hit him so hard I broke his testicles.
Michelle Obama: No you didn’t!
Madea: Yes I did. Broke both his balls. Of course that is why he is know as the best ‘bad ball hitter” in baseball history. And that’s how you handle a Pirate. Tell that skinny ass half a cracker husband of yours. To take care of a Pirate you just hit hard enough to knock his balls off. Simple as that.
Michelle Obama: I will pass it along Auntie.
Marian Robinson: You do that honey. Now have some waffles before that fool wakes up and hogs them all.
2 comments:
"Bad ball hitter"! That cracked me up Trooper because he was!
Yeah he was, but you didn't know the rest of the story.
Post a Comment