Tweeting my ass though Tinseltown

Tweety began a series of cartoons and movies that emphasized her sweet innocent nature as she was swept into precarious situations that were only ameliorated by her chaste and simple bird braininess. Warner Brothers wanted to keep her as a virginal and chaste role model for children and she was only cast in the most innocent of cartoons. They even tied down her budding bird breasts so she would not seem so mature and remain an idol of the tweaners a new demographic that they were trying to exploit. Tweety naturally began to rebel against the stifling of her natural yearning for more adult roles. An ill advised photo shoot for Vanity Fair with her father in quasi erotic positions caused a major scandal that almost ended her career. So she had to cover up her romance with that rough neck Top Cat. They couldn’t be seen together in public or her career could be destroyed. People are very judgmental about cartoons. I mean look at Heckle and Jeckel. They lost everything after Heckel beat the crap out of Jeckel before the Grammy’s. The photo’s they had in the New York Post ended their career. Of course no one spoke openly about it. They blamed the fact that it was domestic violence. And of course it didn’t help that they were black birds. People are so quick to judge.
(Tweeting my ass through Tinseltown, The Tweety Bird Story, By Tweety Bird, Warner Brothers Pocket Books, 1989)