Forcas: Will you be interviewing any new announcers my dread Lord? I know that there are several new candidates.
Lucifer: Sure that sounds like fun. But don't bring out that Wacky Khadafy shithead. Enough with the A-Rabs. They are always whining about the Jews and what not. I don't want to hear it. Without the hebes I would have to close up shop for crying out loud. They are the majority down here for fucks sake. Plus what the Fuck. I am Jewish after all.
Forcas: No I am sorry sire. I didn't mean to have him bother you. But he was very amusing even to a jaded demon such as myself. Especially when he was in drag. He looked like your Uncle Miltie.
Lucifer: Seriously Forcas you should know better than that. Uncle Miltie always freaks me out. Ever since we made the deal where he got the biggest sclong in the world and all the business success possible in the 1950's he has been busting my cojones. I can't even find a punishment. When I had Samson cornhole him he actually enjoyed it. I won't have as much trouble with a tortured soul until Titus shows up. Who else do you have to bring in to interview.
Forcas: We have the famous computer geek and businessman Steve Jobs.
Lucifer: Really. That's cool. It will still be a couple of years till Gates shows up. Send him in.
Steve Jobs: (tumbles through the trap door to fall in front of the throne of Lucifer) Oh Wow! Oh Wow! Oh Wow! Where am I?
Lucifer: You're in Hell shithead. Oh Wow indeed!
Steve Jobs: How did I end up in Hell? I was a good guy. I worked hard and gave a lot of people jobs and a good living.
Lucifer: Well of course you did. That's why you have to suffer the burning torments of Hell. Don't you know that is the official platform of the Democratic Party? Businessmen who create jobs go straight to Hell. Aren't you sorry you gave those commie pricks money instead of the Little Sisters of the Poor? You Shithead.Start reading douchenozzle!
Steve Jobs: Hello. ATTENTION! ATTENTION!! ALL THE TORTURED SOULS IN HELL!! I want to bring you the news. But first you will have to download the new application on your Mac's. If you have a PC you are out of luck. Now go to the operating system and write in this code hmtl.......ahhhhhhhhhhh(a trap door opens and he falls into the fiery pits of hell)
Lucifer: Jeez I forgot how much I hate those Apple fucks. That's why I made that deal with Gates. I can't wait till he show up. Let's go Forcas. I want to watch the game. I hear the Packers are playing. They are my team. The fuckers.
11 comments:
Oh Wow, oh wow, oh wow, indeed.
Enough with the A-Rabs. They are always whining about the Jews and what not.
Steve's biological dad was Syrian immigrant and grad student, Abdulfattah John Jandali.
Thou art truly evil, Blogfather.
Well done, Troop. Good one.
Clean up on comment 3!
De gustibus non disputandum est
And the wichsende trash is back.
I'd put a restraining order on J. The creep sent me emails and stalked me.
J needs a good ass beating. Go back to Althouse J, she has that noncomital neutral neutrality thing going on.
Alhouse is reporting that Jobs refused to shower or use deodorant and liked to soak his feet in the toilet.
genius.
Good thing he was not sitting next to Trooper on the flight down, he would have been even worse than the guy he was sitting next him on the flight down.
J you are not welcome here. Your posts will be deleted. Please take your business over to Althouse as she seems to enjoy your paticular brand of witt and wisdom.
You are not welcome here.
Such a weird thing is going on with Steve Jobs: at first, pagan idolatry & and celebration. Then, when it came out that he offended some leftist sacred cow, vilification.
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