It is very tough when you are working with Dolphins. And a lesbian dolphin is paticularly hard to work with. They don't like men for starters and are always trying to hurt them. They keep trying to put on birkenstock sandals when they don't have any feet. And they never want to wear make up.
So we had to get some back up fish. The most popular one was a young perky female called Squirty. Squirty was a whore. She would swim up to the men and present her fishy vagina to be serviced. Sort of like a Kardashian. All of the young boys on the show had their first sexual experinaces with Squirty. And all of the crew. And pretty much anyone who got into the water with her. Which turned out to be very important for the NFL. You see one of the investors in Ivan Tors studio was this guy named Joe Robbie. He always said Squirty was the best sexual experiance he ever had. You see her vagina would secret this fishy lube which squirt out whenever she got excited. Thats why they called her squirty.
He loved her so much that he named his expansion AFL football team after her. He wanted to call his team the Fishy Squirty Vaginas but Al Davis and Sonny Werblin convinced him to go with the "Miami Dolphins."
But you should realize that they were really the "Fishy Squirty Vaginas."
(Ivan Tors The E True Hollywood Story of Flipper)
So we had to get some back up fish. The most popular one was a young perky female called Squirty. Squirty was a whore. She would swim up to the men and present her fishy vagina to be serviced. Sort of like a Kardashian. All of the young boys on the show had their first sexual experinaces with Squirty. And all of the crew. And pretty much anyone who got into the water with her. Which turned out to be very important for the NFL. You see one of the investors in Ivan Tors studio was this guy named Joe Robbie. He always said Squirty was the best sexual experiance he ever had. You see her vagina would secret this fishy lube which squirt out whenever she got excited. Thats why they called her squirty.
He loved her so much that he named his expansion AFL football team after her. He wanted to call his team the Fishy Squirty Vaginas but Al Davis and Sonny Werblin convinced him to go with the "Miami Dolphins."
But you should realize that they were really the "Fishy Squirty Vaginas."
(Ivan Tors The E True Hollywood Story of Flipper)
24 comments:
I am just glad I didn't get fucked on the suicide pool this week.
By a smelly squirty fish vagina. Just like Reggie Bush did with Kim.
Is it true that women smell like anchovies or some other kind of fishy smell?
Have you guys ever done a women who's pussy really smelled?
Describe the smell.
You still fucked her though didn't ya, you whores.
True story, dykes like whale watching tours. If you ever go on one there is definitely going to be a gaggle of dykes getting all wet.
It looks like Tebow is being exposed as a false prophet today. Yikes, it's getting ugly in Denver. All those folks in Miami who were cheering him last week are doing the denying-three-times Peter thing this week.
Titus, you yourself have commented on how when you pull your dick out of some anonymous little brown diseased guy's asshole that it smells like an outhouse.
You are one sick mother fondler.
True story, dykes like whale watching tours.
That is actually true.
You are one sick mother fondler.
Well probably not Sixty...because he is not into mothers. Well except for the tits.
Yeah, Fred, except that, as with the outhouse smell story, he actually did write, upon more than one occasion about fondling his mother's breasts. When combined with his desire to see his father die, it seems Steve is not a well man.
Yeah Sixty, someone should write a play about it. Oh wait, they did. It is Oedipus Rex.
But watch out, Titus might get confused, think he is living Equus, and stab out the eyes of the rare clumber instead. That would be tragic.
This song sort of fits Titus' fantasies too.
Here is a darker version for Titus...
Yup, right at 8:00 we can see where Titus likely plagiarized his fantasy blog comment.
Is it true that women smell like anchovies or some other kind of fishy smell?
Lead with your Inner Clumber, Titus!
Make puppy eyes at the women who invite you to fondle their breasts with your paws and beg them into letting you poke your nose between their legs for some comparative whiffs and maybe a lick. Either that, or root around in your mom's laundry pile next time you're home, grab a pair of her ginormous used underpants in your teeth, trot back to your favorite resting place and revel their peculiar pungency. Train your nose and eliminate the need to wonder what the other dogs in the barber shop are talking about while you sit and stay in the chair.
Sixty, give me your old flappy meat curtains, so I can enjoy some old, dirty lips, penetrating my hogs.
Hey Steve, I am just trying to help you remember what you wrote. I know you have early onset dementia, probably related to something you picked up from one of your rough tricks or heavy drug and alcohol use, but seriously, what you just wrote doesn't even make sense.
You might want to see a doctor. Your mental status seems to be in steep decline.
@Fred: Is there some kind of Doors commemoration going on? I got this comment on something I wrote about Morrison: link.
I was not aware of one chickenlittle, but I wouldn't be surprised. Of course when it comes to Oedipus urges, I suspect Titus got his inspiration from Morrison, not Sophecles. MamaM's advice to Titus is funny and spot on.
Do they make flannel shirts that fit dolphins?
Hogs plural?
Maybe
the Secret Wish
is a pair
for the lips
like tits.
Sixty makes me horny, that's all.
Hogs plural?
Sounds like Titus is bi.....
....furcated.
Of course I do, but the real question is, what makes you demented?
List of primitive living mammals with bifurcated hogs (with room at the end for others!):
platypus
echidna
opossums,
Tasmanian devils,
quolls
bilbies,
bandicoots,
koalas,
wombats,
wallabies,
potoroos,
numbat,
gliders
... and others.
Post a Comment