Whose that girl rubbing her pussy?

She often did it in the dangest places because she picked the dangest places to take a bath. But that was only because she wore old fashioned underwear that became so famous they named the town after it.

Yes she loved to rub that pussy.

Whose that girl?

Oh sorry about that the meat is here!

Sorry we order filet mignon with the champagne sauce and it was so good we forgot to take a picture before stated eating. Here we are half way through.

Served with a nice potion of rice and beans.

Lem would like my food blogging a lot better than some people I know. Just sayn'

Chorizo and Yucca Fries

We had a little upset when we first got there because it was just too hot in the joint. So we sat at the bar for an appetizer until the AC kicked in.

They have a nice little appetizer there of chorizo and yucca fries. Yucca is a tuber that looks like a piece of wood that you find in grocery store and pass right by. But when you fry it up like a French fry it is very tasty. They use an inferior form of chorizo now but it is still tasty. They used to have the good chorizo that the would slice to the size of a quarter and fry with the yucca. That is how I do it at home when I make it. But this was pretty good with lemon and some black olives.

And the cocktails of course.

Cocktails at Via Brazil

So we spent the day fabric shopping in the Garment district today. We found some stuff but we couldn't close the deal because the owners weren't there so we have to go back tomorrow. It was a pain in the ass and a bunch of rolls of fabric fell on me but what are you gonna do.

Then we went to a fancy hair salon where the wife got a really expensive haircut that she really didn't like. It was a change for her and like most people they don't like change. So she was pretty upset.

To salvage the night we went to the restaurant I took her to on our first date. Via Brazil a Brazilian joint on W46th Street that used to be one of my haunts back in the 1980's. Of course nobody working there would remember us so it was no big deal. But the food is pretty good and the cocktails are great. I had my favorite capirinha's  and the wife had a nice tasty Malbac.

We had to turn it around.

I mean I am not about to go rent a dog to walk to get out of the house you know what I mean.

Not to be out done

Sixty Grit sent us his prom photos.

He had two dates.

Of course he was related to both of them.

But hey who would say no?

Ok, ok you were right....here is some Gnuilla Hutton

Chickie reminded me that he asked for more Gnuilla Hutton photos first and I have been very remiss.

He was nice enough to forward me a photo he got when he met her in an autograph show in San Diego.

The photo's he took with Jan Brady are not safe for work. Just sayn'

You asked for it you got it revisted.

One of my first posts with a photo was a request from El Pollo Raylan who asked for a photo of Donna Douglas who was Ella May Clampett in the mid-sixties.

So here she is when she was sixty six years old.

I don't know why he says I don't take requests. Anything you guys want to read about just let me know.

Except math.

Fuck that.

No math.

Another One Bites the Dust

So I went by Mastellones to see what was up. There are three partners. I saw Nunzio who was one of the cooks. I go "How's it going man?" He's all 'It's going great, justa great Jimmy." Then he runs away to the kitchen.

Vinny the main owner is the bigmouth boisterous guy. He is the one that handles all the business. He is a real asshole. You know. He is just like me. He was meeting with the guy taking over. They were walking around and he didn't even acknowledge me. Fair enough. Business is business.

Then there is James who handle the deli counter and also did a lot of the cooking. I told him I hope this was what he wanted. He said he was going on vacation and when he got back in September he would start looking. He made sure I got my 50% which was a great deal. You see they were selling all of their stuff at 50% off so I got a bunch of non-perishable stuff like soup and olives and household cleaning products.

In just two days it will all go away.

Roll Models

You know who was a role model for me.

Chuck Wepner.

The Bayonne Bleeder.

This dude kept coming no matter how bad he got his ass kicked. He would bleed and fight and fight and bleed all over the fuckin place. He was the original model for "Rocky" and he was one tough  mofro.

Sometimes when you are battered and bleeding and everything seems to go against you it easy to quit. But you have to suck it up and keep swinging. You never know.

You have a punchers chance.

Another one bites the dust.

Another day and another Mom and Pop store closes on Court St.

Mastellone House of Meats is closing this Wednesday. This is where I would go to get cold cuts and meat and all my stuff especially since Good Food closed down. Now I used to do the taxes for them and I knew they were taking a hit from the hipster joint "Union Market" that opened across the street. The young douches in the neighborhood would rather go and pay twice as much then give the old time people their business. The old Italians that had shopped there ever since it was on Columbia St. are almost all gone now so they sold out. I don't know who bought it. They had sold it once before to some Koreans but I don't know if it is going to stay a deli. They own the building so it could be anybody just like Good Food rented it to a bank.

Little by little the scale has turned to make this neighborhood just like Manhattan. It will be all chain stores and banks soon. No more Mom and Pop.

Time to ramp up the exit strategy.

Today is one of my favorite days of the year.

It's National Lasagna Day!

Happy Lasagna Day you noodle's!

Today July 29th is officially designated as National Lasagna Day! Now it is July and way too hot to put on the Oven. That is why National Lasagna Day is in July. It is too hot for you to cook so you can go out to eat! All day long many Italian restaurants are offering discounts on a nice heaping plate of Lasagna.

The generally accepted origin of lasagna is that it comes from the Greek word that means
"trivet or stand for a pot", The Romans stole the word and changed it to "lasanum", which means something more like "cooking pot" in Latin. The Italians used it to refer to the pot  that
lasagna is made in. Soon the name of the pot became the name of the dish.

Everybody and their nona has a favorite recipe for lasagna. Bolognese or vegetarian we all know what we like. So let today be a perfect day to enjoy a nice heaping piece of lasagna.

You know who is a big fan of lasagna? Santa Claus. That is why he wears a red suit because he is always staining it with sauce. I bet he is enjoying some right now.

I am going to go out and get a big plate at Vinny's of Carroll Gardens and do it up right!

Merry Lasagna Day!

The Rifleman

Mark McCain and his friends Nick and Timmy were playing tag outside the schoolhouse when they noticed the drunken Indian Chief Stalking Horse walking down the road. He was carrying a strange machine and following behind a fella driving a medicine wagon. Now those were the people who went from town to town selling elixir for what ails you. But Lucas McCain always called it snake oil which was not any good for anybody.
"Say what do you have there Chief?" shouted Nick. He was the boldest of them. Of course if he wasn't the boldest he never would have seen Miz Coleman's teats. He described as cold and pale like a glass of milk with a blueberry floating in them.
"Ugh. Me don't know. Just told to carry weight. I just no sabe." Chief Stalking Horse was not all that bright. In fact the wooden Indian in front of the cigar store once beat him in a spelling bee. "Come see children. Machine heap good. Very smart."
So the children all followed the wagon and the staggering redskin into down in a strange parade of foolishness.
When the got to the center of town, they stopped the medicine Wagon and Chief Stalking Horse put the machine on the back. It was bright and shiny and looked very new and expensive. The drummer running the show started shouting.
"Come one come all and see the splendiferous exciting and entertaining font of wisdom straight from the great city of Chicago?. Just put in a penny and pull down the lever and get a message from beyond. Brought to you by the miracle of science and the hand of God."
"Why that's bull hoey" shouted Jake one of the town layabouts. "A penny. Who would pay a penny for that?"
"Why any fair minded  gent who wanted to give fair value for his entertainment. You don't expect to get your answers for free. This machine is far smarter than you. It was tutored by the great minds of the Univeristy. You should bow down to it an give your misley pennies to obtain the fruits of it's labors."
"Ugh. Es bein. Yo soy muy entiendo. I go first," slurred the slighted soused Sioux. Or Apache. Or Puerto Rican. Nobody was sure.
The Chief put in his penny and pulled the lever. Lights flashed. Levers moved. Gears turned. There was a ping. And a slip of paper came out of the bottom of the machine.
"What does it say" asked someone in the crowd. "Read it to us" exclaimed another.
Since the Chief could not read it handed the paper over to the drummer. He made a great show of unfolding it and holding it close to his eyes so he could read it.
"The beginning is over and now is the time to end it. Time to go back. Grace."
"Dern what's that mean?" asked Mark. "I don't get it."
"Neither do I"said young Nick as he stole a glance at Miss Hettys teats.
But somehow it seemed that the Chief knew. He looked down at his torn and battered moccasins and muttered to himself. "I miss mi big Papi."
It was all very strange.

Whose that girl?

She used to do a TV show with a wizard and a gorilla and they weren't Harry Potter or Magilla. But the main dude she hung with was just a savage even though he loved Crack's blog.

Whose that girl?

Roll Models

You know who was another role model for me. Forrest Tucker.

A big burly Irishman he was the guy everybody went to in F Troop to fix all the problems like he was their Daddy. He always had a scheme and although the didn't always work out he always tried. He was good natured and loved to drink and eat and tell stories.

Now not everyone liked him but everybody knew he was there when the shit hit the fan.

Also he was know as having the biggest dick in Hollywool.

I am know as acting like the biggest dick on the Internet.

So there you go.

These are the kind of apps I need for my phone.

So we got a nice bunch of apps to munch on before the main course.

Soppressata Salami. Prosciutto. Figs. Walnuts. Fontina cheese. Grana Padana cheese. Olives.

A nice Chianti to wash it down after the cocktails.

Main course. The wife had gluten free macaroni with zucchini and I had a ribeye steak bloody rare
with rosemary and garlic rub. Good stuff.

It gets weird

So we are enjoying our cocktails at high table near the bar and notice something weird. There was a family of albino's sitting in every seat at the bar. I mean they weren't all albino's but five or six of them were. Every other seat with the bleached out kids who want you to go into the cornfield.

Jay the waiter comes up to me to ask how we are doing and I go "I don't know I feel pretty fucked up."

"Why's that?"

"Because I walked into the middle of the "Da Vinci Code" that's why. What the fuck?"

Time for a cocktail at Marco Polo

So we had another busy day on Saturday and I was too tired to cook at 10pm so we went over to Marco Polo to eat.

We had some great cocktails to start the night off.

I had a dirty Martini and the wife had a Blueberry Pimmcup which sounded like Blueberry piss cup but thankfully was not. It was just weird but not as weird as the night would get.

Superman and the mole men

The Rifleman

The stage pulled up in front of the Hotel in North Fork, New Mexico. It was dusty and worn and the driver looked exhausted. He batted some dust off his pants with his hat as he was getting down to open the doors of the coach.
"Northfork folks. We are stopping overnight. The stage company has reserved some rooms for you in the hotel." He handed down an older woman who had been traveling for a few days but turned his back on the next person out of the coach.
Mark McCain and his friends Timmy and Nick were there to greet the coach. They always liked to see who got off the stage. Sometimes the people were interesting. Sometimes the women had big teats. They liked big teats. Especially the pointy ones. They made them feel all strange and warm inside.
Timmy was very artistic. He loved music and would often carve himself a recorder to play weird and boring music on.  He called it classical but most of his friends just called it bad. He never played the hits like Jimmy Crack Corn. It was just unfortunate that he kept falling down the well. Luckily he owned a collie.
Nick was a bad boy. He wanted to grow up to be a Pinkerton so he practiced by peeping in windows. He hadn't got caught yet but you wouldn't want to be in his shoes if Miz Coleman caught him looking in her window.
"Look Mark. Look at that fat bastard" laughed Nick. "He can't even roll out of the coach he is so huge."
A rotund man dressed in flowered shirt with a florid face struggled to get out of the stage. He was about 6 foot 3 and weighed over three hundred pounds easy.  Mark didn't have a cow that big on the ranch.
"Hey kids what is the name of this jerkwater town."
"It's Northfork sir. Northfork New Mexico."
"What's your name kid."
"Mark McCain sir."
"Is there a saloon around here?'
"Yessir. Right across the street."
"Good. There many dance hall girls there."
"There are a few. My dad calls them soiled doves" piped up Nick. "I don't know why cause their underwear is always clean."
"How do you know that kid."
"I just do that's all."
"Well that's good. See I am an underwear salesman and I got some new bras and such to sell. Let's get this show on the road." He pulled an enormous suitcase off the top of the stage and started struggling to the saloon.
"I hope he got some pointy ones Mark" whispered Timmy. "I like the pointy ones."
"Me too. Lets follow along and see what happens."

Role Models

Rodney Dangerfield has always been a role model for me. Well the way he was in the beginning of "Easy Money." Drinking. Gambling. Eating donuts and pizza. Wearing the regular guy look.

Just like Rodney I get no respect. But unlike Rodney I ain't gonna change. No matter how much money is at stake.

I think my glasses are half filled....wtf?

So the wife insisted a get a new pair of glasses. I need glasses to read nowadays because I am so fuckin' old. I had a pair of mega expensive ones but I used to use the cheap readers that I would buy at the show for $2 or $3 a pair. Then if I lost them or broke them I didn't give a shit.

Anyhoo I had to wait for her to pick out the new frames for me. You see I tried to explain being married in another thread. You stand your ground on some things. On most of the stuff who gives a shit. I don't care what glasses look like. We consulted and I more or less liked the semi-buddy Holly look. Black frames. Big enough for my fat head. I am wearing them now and they are working ok.

I still think I look like Rodney Dangerfield in his regular guy look only with a Buddy Holly twist.

What a fuckin' nerd!

Role Models

Or is it Roll Models. You know a guy with a nice roll around his midsection.

Some people have athletes or academics or teachers or actors as their role models. My are a little more eclectic.

One of them was Captain Lou Albano. Capt. Lou just didn't give a shit. He had a good time and wore his Hawaiian shirts and drank his whiskey and smoked his cigars.

And the girls he hung out with.

They just wanted to have fun.

It's a sin!

On my way to work this morning I walked past the restaurant Vinzee's that was being demolished. Now you might remember the story. This spot used to be a Dairy Queen and attached Laundromat that this old Italian couple had owned for forty years. They put their kid through Georgetown and medical school while wearing the same pair of sweatpants. So when they were getting ready to retire their kid convinces them to let him open up a restaurant. They insist that it have ice cream like their old place so he opens up this joint that has hot dogs and burgers and ice cream. But nobody would go in.

The old lady stopped me one day as I was walking by and said "Why a you no a going into my sons store. What did I ever do to you?" I replied "Senora nobody loves not dogs more than me. Not even skinny Japs in a hot dog eating contest. I stop every day on my way to the store for a slice of pizza. I would do that for a hot dog. But not for a five dollar hot dog. That's your problem."

Plus they had no experience in running a joint like this. They were way overstaffed. A cook. A cashier. Two waitresses. A manager. You needed to run that joint with one person who spoke English to take the money and a Mexican to do all the work. Then they might have survived.

But they didn't and now they are ripping out all the brand new fixtures and equipment that they put in when they started. I estimate that they spent around $300,000 to fix if up in the first place. Some hipster asshole who has a joint on Smith St that was very popular in a very small space is moving in. Not my kind of place. 

It is just a sin that so much money go wasted. A sin I tell you.

Whose that girl?

She was in a few westerns but mostly she played a teenager who had to see Marcus Welby or go to the Medical Center with herpes or something. She got every part that Kay Lenz missed out on. She must of made out with Jan Michael Vincent about a thousand times.

Whose that girl?

The Rifleman

Lucas McCain and his son Mark were in town on a cloudy Friday in July. Lucas had some banking to do and of course Mark was at school. Lucas decided to kill some time at the jail with his friend Sheriff Micah Torrance while he was waiting for Mark to finish so they could ride back home together. He was on his second cup of coffee when his son burst into the room.
"Pa, Pa are you here?"
"Yes I am here Mark," replied Lucas "why are you in such an all fangled hurry. Did you see a ghost?"
"No Pa but something pretty strange. Do you remember that Indian fella that has been hanging around town for the past couple of months?"
"I know him," answered Micah. "They call him Chief Stalking Horse. Did he cause any trouble Mark. Is he bothering you?"
"Why do you say that Micah" asked Lucas. "Is he a trouble maker?"
"Well he is drunk all the time Lucas boy. He doesn't do much. Just gets sad and drinks some more. And sing sad Spanish songs."
"Why Spanish songs Micah" piped up Mark. "I thought he was an Indian."
"Most of the Indians here in New Mexico speak Spanish Mark. I think Stalking Horse is either an Apache or a Puerto Rican. I can't figure out which. You know like Sal Mineo."
"So what did he do Mark?"
"It's not what he did Pa it was who he was with. He was with Lonesome Larry. Or Lying Larry like everyone is calling him since he started that ruckus with Paulie the sign maker. They were whispering and talking in secret. I think Lying Larry is trying to convince him to do something. It was strange because nobody talks to Lying Larry anymore. Most turn away. But this fella didn't do anything either when the fight was going on. Maybe he agreed with it. Do you thinks so Micah?"
"No I don't think so Mark. Stalking Horse is a right nice fella if a drunk and morose one. I don't think he has mean bone in his body. But I hope he doesn't get convinced to do something he shouldn't do. That Lying Larry can be pretty convincing. Look how he got that dried up old spinster to marry him and give him half of her ranch. That was impressive I have to say. But I will keep an eye on him. Thanks for letting me know Mark."
"No problem Micah. I would hate to see him get in trouble."
"You are a good boy Mark. Here is a penny. Go get yourself some candy and stare at Miss Milly's teats. I will be along directly."
"Thanks Pa."

Palate Cleanser- for the Ladies

I didn't want to leave youse ladies out so here is some beef cake from last years vacation at the Seatuck Inn.

We are not going to Seatuck this summer because we have no employees to handle the store. We have set up a cruise for the week of Labor Day when we might just close for a week.

So anyway. Enjoy!

Panda Sex with Charles Bukowski

BE KIND

we are always asked
to understand the other person's
viewpoint
no matter how
out-dated
foolish or
obnoxious.

one is asked
to view
their total error
their life-waste
with
kindliness,
especially if they are
aged.

but age is the total of
our doing.
they have aged
badly
because they have
lived
out of focus,
they have refused to
see.

not their fault?

whose fault?
mine?

I am asked to hide
my viewpoint
from them
for fear of their
fear.

age is no crime

but the shame
of a deliberately
wasted
life

among so many
deliberately
wasted
lives

is.       

What if?

Leisure Suit Larry decided to reveal all and published the photo that got the professor to go out with him?

Would you believe it?

What if?

Dust Bunny Queen had listened to her Mom and became a Nun.

Just think of the possibilities.

What if?

What if Crack was so cavalier about Meade revealing his name would he mind that I posted his photo.

I think not.

Whose that girl- Palate cleanser

We are all so tired of the drama that it is time to combine two of our favorite series. "Whose that Girl" and "Palate Cleanser."

This lovely loved a wimpy guy on TV in the sixties and he just never banged her the way she needed to get banged. I mean he was named after a fruit so maybe he was a fruit. He was a dancer after all.

Whose that girl?

Malbac is the way to go!

For the past year I have been mainly drinking Malbac from South America. It is a dry red wine that is far superior to many bottles you can buy for four times the price.

It runs from $8 to $10 a bottle in the liquor store and is often the lowest priced wine on the menu at a restaurant. I recommend it highly for a nice wine to enjoy with your meal.

This is the bottle I got a Enoteca for about $25 and it was just great.

It's PIzza time at Enoteca!

So the temperature dropped to about 60 last night. Which is great since it had been in the 90's all week long. We were so busy yesterday that I was too tired to cook so we decided to go out to eat again. Since it was colder we decided to go to Enoteca instead of Marco Polo. You will remember that Enoteca is the brick oven pizza place next door that Marco started to catch the younger crowd.

We have been staying away from carbs and gluten so we decided to go nuts with a pizza.

We started with a nice bottle of Malbac and a cheese platter. They had changed over the cheese they used to have and I wasn't too happy with the new choices. They got  rid of the fontina and the mozzarella and got this artsy farsty artisanal shit that the hipsters must like. The manager came over to sit with us because we hadn't been there in months and he wanted to be extra nice so we would come back more often than usual. In fact a lot of the former waitstaff was there as they had just gone to the wake next door for the customer I was telling you about. So all these knuckle heads came over to say hello and tell us about where they work. One idiot says "You have to come to my new rock climbing studio on Degraw Street. I will get you in for free." Of course she was drunk out of her face. I mean do I look like the kind of guy who goes rock climbing? I only want to climb into a rocks glass with some whiskey in it for crying out loud!

Anyways the pizza was great and the wine was wonderful and we had a lot of laughs.

Living well is the best revenge folks.

Blake shows his stuff....

DURING the whole of a dull, dark, and soundless day in the autumn of the year, when the clouds hung oppressively low in the heavens, I had been passing alone, on Firefox, through a singularly dreary tract of the Internet, and at length found myself, as the shades of the evening drew on, within view of the melancholy House of Althouse. I know not how it was—but, with the first glimpse of the blog, a sense of insufferable gloom pervaded my spirit. I say insufferable; for the feeling was unrelieved by any of that half-pleasurable, because poetic, sentiment, with which the mind usually receives even the sternest natural images of the desolate or terrible. I looked upon the scene before me—upon the mere blog, and the simple Amazon portal features of the domain—upon the bleak links—upon the vacant eye-like vlogs—upon a few rank commenters—and upon a few desultory "Let's take a closer look at" posts—with an utter depression of soul which I can compare to no earthly sensation more properly than to the after-dream of the reveller upon opium—the bitter lapse into every-day life—the hideous dropping off of the veil. There was an iciness, a sinking, a sickening of the heart—an unredeemed dreariness of thought which no goading of the imagination could torture into aught of the sublime. What was it—I paused to think—what was it that so unnerved me in the contemplation of the House of Althouse? It was a mystery all insoluble; nor could I grapple with the shadowy fancies that crowded upon me as I pondered. I was forced to fall back upon the unsatisfactory conclusion, that while, beyond doubt, there are combinations of very simple natural objects which have the power of thus affecting us, still the analysis of this power lies among considerations beyond our depth. It was possible, I reflected, that a mere different arrangement of the particulars of the scene, of the details of the picture, would be sufficient to modify, or perhaps to annihilate its capacity for sorrowful impression; and, acting upon this idea, I reined my horse to the precipitous brink of a black and lurid tarn that lay in unruffled lustre by the dwelling, and gazed down—but with a shudder even more thrilling than before—upon the remodelled and inverted images of the gray sedge, and the ghastly tree-stems, and the vacant and eye-like windows.

The RIfleman

Lucas McCain and son Mark rode into Northfolk right around noon. They had some chores to do and wanted to get them done so the could have time to get a nice dinner at the hotel and get home some time before dark. It was no fun cooking everyday for a widower and his son so they always looked forward to a steak and all the fixings when they went into town.

The got to the middle of town and got off their horses in front of the Sheriffs office. Micah Torrance can out of the doorway of his office. Micah was a grizzled old man who had been there and back. Looked like a lariat that had torn in two but had been mended. He had his limp and his scattergun as always.

"Hey Lucas boy. Hey Mark. You boys in town for dinner."
"Yes Micah but first we have to see Miz Hattie about some supplies. I need to pick up some bacon and flour and a little molasses. Oh yeah and a box of shells because I used up most of the ones I had when I killed five people in the last episode."

Suddenly there was a shout and a commotion down at the other end of street.

"What's going on Micah?"
"I don't know Lucas. Lets go down and take a look see."
"Mark you hang back. I don't want you to be to close to the action in case it turns ugly. Oh look it's Lonesome Larry. It has to be ugly."

When they got to end of the street they saw Lonesome Larry holding Paulie the sign painter face down in the horse through. Larry was not well liked in North Fork. You see he had moved there from Indiana when he married the spinster Miss Annie and moved into her farm. Nobody could believe she would get married. You see she drank. A passel full. And she was a mean drunk. She once went after Ed the Butcher when he got her order wrong and tried to cut off his man parts. She didn't seem too partial to man parts. We all wonder how Larry got past that. Most folks thought they reckoned that they were small and dainty. His man parts that is.

"That's enough Larry. Let him up."
"You stay out of this. You can't tell me what to do."
"I can Larry" replied Micah as he swung his scattergun over. "I'm telling to let him before he drowns."
"Damn it all to hell. He owes me money Micah. And I want it back. He is selling his signs and living high off the hog and he owes me money."

Paulie the sign painter slumped down on the floor. He was a large man. As big as a barrel. He was full bald and wore worn overalls and was a strange man. He never could talk to a lady and he was very friendly with some of the actors who passed through town. People called him a berdache which was a Sioux term that Mark didn't understand.

"You ok Paul" asked Lucas McCain." "Been better Lucas." "How much you owe him," "Thirty five cents." "What" exclaimed Micah "You try to kill a man for thirty five cents. Here. Here's your money. Now go back to that crazy old crone you married before I have to throw you in Jail."

Lucas lifted Paul up and dusted him off. Which was a chore because he weighed about 400 pounds.
"You  go on about your business and don't worry about that weasel. Being married to that woman is punishment enough for about thirty lifetimes."

Late at dinner Mark had a question.

"Pa why was Mr. House so mean to Paulie?
"Cause he  is different son. Some people talk a good game but they are all about money. And when someone is different they will try to take advantage of them and think no one will stop them. Paul is  a good man. But Mark there is just one thing and it is very important."
"What that's Pa?"
"Don't ever let him buy you candy and take you behind the barn. Ok."
"Thanks Pa. Let's have apple pie for dessert."
"Sure son. That will be great."

How High the Moon

Lola lets us know what's what!

What rcocean said......

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Doubling Down on Stupid

One of the virtues of fighting with a stupid person is that they always double down on stupid.

After the brouhaha over LSL comments that were deleted he went and reposted them again!  After Freeman had them deleted. Hmmmmmmm. I wonder how that one is going to work out. I am tempted to post a comment or two but why get in the way when someone is rushing to destroy themselves.

You can't make this shit up.

Palate cleanser

Hey here is a palate cleanser so Icepick won't bitch about Palladian's personal Hot Tub Time Machine photos are posted on line.

Lola Albright was the co-star of Peter Gunn and a great jazz singer. Download some of her stuff. It is great shit. I kid you not.

And she was a hot babe back in the day.

Gluten free shit.

So Lisa decided to treat herself and have pasta. Gluten free pasta. But they didn't have any broccoli rabe so they made it with asparagus and sausage and garlic and oil.

Pretty tasty.

It is great when you can order off the menu.

For an appetizer we ordered assorted cheeses and prosciutto and salami and olives and figs and sun dried tomatoes. It was pretty good. Somebody at the bar said....hey I want that...and they told them it wasn't on the menu. Hee.

Rib eye steak rubbed with Rosemary and garlic

So I decided I felt like having a steak. A rib eye on the bone rubbed with rosemary and garlic. Sautéed potatoes. Good stuff.

Served bloody rare. Like I like my comment section. Just sayn'

Time for cocktails.

So we had a very busy day today. I went and got new specs and Lisa had an eye exam.

Then we went to the store to do a fitting for the fall line while we had a full store and had to sell. We did pretty good and had a bunch of online sales I had to process in between times. So we were frazzled.

We had to do the Wednesday night thing at Marco Polo. It was a tough night because one of the regulars had croaked and everyone was at the wake. I didn't know about it cause I would have went. It was only one night and everyone came back and started drinking big time.

I had told Tony the bartender that I wanted to drink capirina's so he got the necessary stuff to make it happen. Good times/

There's something about Mary....

But he seems to be ok.

I have heard from Palladian and he is doing much better. Several people have stepped up and he can see his way clear now until he gets back on his feet in the fall.

Now we can go back to making fun of the fucking bastard with a clear conscience.

Mr Roper want's to get back on track

Or get back on the back. Or something.

You know what I mean you knuckleheads.

He was one tough Mo

No not Palladian. He is a big pussy. Crying all the time.

No Emile Griffith who died today after a long bout of being punch drunk. The last time I saw him at the Garden he looked like the Evil Blogger Lady in her last video. He was just gone man.

I only saw him fight once at the Garden. He fought a guinea from Carroll Gardens named Vito Antuofermo in 1974. He lost. It was a unanimous decision but as I remember it he probably should have won. The Garden was grooming Vito in those days so I think there was a thumb on the scale. Of course that was not the only reason.

You see everybody hated him. He beat Bernie "The Kid" Paret to death one night because Bernie kept calling him a maricon. Which means faggot in Spanish. Griffith hated that because that was not what you called someone in 1962. Plus it was true so he felt he had to kick his ass to prove it wasn't. Or something. Whatever.

He was a hell of a fighter though. I ran into him a lot when I used to go to the fights at the Felt Forum at the Garden back in day. Or at Jimmy's Corner the boxing bar in Times Square. He wasn't very approachable like a lot of the other fighters were so most of us just left him in peace. Maybe send over a drink but that was about it.

Rest in Peace Emile. I hope you find the Peace that eluded you here on this vale of tears.

Some of us are bending over backwards

To be nice but we have to go back to being the regular shitheads we have always been. Just sayn'

I think it might be time to move in a different direction.

You know back to the reason why this blog exists.

Hot Pants!

Of course the best kind of MILF

Is the one that teaches her daughters to be little whores.

You gotta love that shit. Just sayn'

Palate cleanser.....the original MILF

Shirley Jones came out with a book today. It details her life in show biz and her troubled marriage to Jack Cassidy which has some kinky shit going on.

It could be pretty interesting.

I love show biz bios. I am currently reading one about Ed Sullivan. Very entertaining.

Keep your chins up!

I was corresponding with Palladian late last night and told him to keep his chins up.  I explained that I know how hard it is too swallow your pride but since he likes to swallow it shouldn't be such a big deal. I asked him if he had anything he would like to share with us. This  was his reply:

Ha,
 
It's good to have a laugh again. I will do my best to keep my chins up, but remember that I'm supporting more chins than a Chinese father without access to birth control.
 
As for swallowing, you're right, but being the big fag that I am, I usually drop to my knees to swallow rather than getting up on my feet.
 
To be serious, and you can post this as a note from me, I'm really humbled that anyone cares about me, let alone a bunchof people that I haven't met in person for the most part.To tell the truth, I'm especially humbled that Theo Boehm would express interest in helping me as I was a bit of an

asshole to him. I've got a tough and abrasive style online sometimes, but I'm really just a squish and it actually pains me to have discord with someone. This homeless experience, the meltdown of my life, has taught me a lot about what's important life. It's probably difficult for anyone to believe, because I
don't talk about it, but my faith in God's grace and mercy has helped me through some really dark hours, and will through many more. I consider everyone's kindness to me to be a manifestation of that grace and mercy, and I'd like to apologize to Theo and to anyone else I've hurt, for what it's worth.
 
I will come over to your blog and visit. I forgot that I have an invite.
 
Thanks again,
Evan

I have met Palladian in person before and I can smell a scam a mile away. This is the real deal of which I have no doubt. Unlike other people who like to deal though mysterious secret emails I asked if I could publish what he wanted to say about this situation. I asked if his Paypal would work and he said is should work fine.  I also asked if there was another way to forward funds directly and he said he would get back to me later today.

Meade is not in cahoots with Palladian. I know we are all wary of anything to do with him. What I suggest is that everyone should do what they want and keep it to themselves. That is the best way. We are not Meade or Althouse where we have to trumpet our good works like the Philistines. Most of us are real committed Christians and the act is recognition enough.

Thank youse guys. You are good eggs.

How I Met Your Mother - The Final Conversation

Icepick just emailed me his new video...pretty cool

The Case of the Well Barbequed Cock

 

My dear Holmes,

It is your most humble petitioner, Inspector Lestrade and once again I must ask for your assistance in a matter of the upmost urgency. It concerns the matter of the dowager Lady Chatterley and her gardener cum lover and their strange and mysterious activities that have come to the attention of the Yard. 

As you may or may not know the Home Office has instituted a policy of reading all mail posted through Her Majesty’s postal system. This is due to the ongoing dangers presented by foreign entities that include both the Czar of all the Russia’s and the Germany so viciously directed by Count Von Bismarck. These external adversaries are so dangerous that it was felt by all of the cabinet that all correspondence must be monitored to determine if any treason was afoot. Your brother Mycroft was fully aware of this most closely held state secret as he is involved in the vetting process through his position in the Home Office. So it is somewhat disquieting when I examine what has recently come to light.

It seems that a most vicious and violent exchange has been occurring between your brother and the gardener cum lover of the spinster Lady Chatterley. The most vile and scurrilous language these hastily scrawled missives so distressed the minor functionary who first opened it that he sent it directly to the Yard and bypassed the review process. These incendiary testaments are most disturbing and obviously the product of a diseased mind with an obsessive need to vindicate past transgressions. I have not seen such ravings outside the walls of Whitechapel over the bodies of eviscerated prostitutes.

I hesitate to approach your brother directly over this matter. I would ask you to contact him and inquire if he has been intercepting these feeble ravings of a disordered intellect? They were addressed to him after all so he might have felt that no one else would need to be apprised. You know how “touchy” he can be.

I have personally always had a most convivial relationship with your brother and have spent many a night in his company at the club where he would regale us with wondrous recipes for beverages and the preparation of poultry. It was passing strange that all of said recipes involved a male bird but such are the eccentricities of genius. He often said that he endeavored to devour a plump cock each and every day. I pray that he is successful with such a fruitful enterprise.

Once again I must beg to ask your forgiveness for my incessant requests but in the interest of comity I think it best that you obtain this information from your sibling. Please convey my best wishes to Mycroft and tell him that my wife much admires his work with young deaf boys. Please assure him that we do not believe anything about this that was recently published in the Police Gazette.

 

I remain as always,
Your obedient servant,
Inspector G. Lestrade
Scotland Yard
October 19, 1899

A personal plea to Sir Archy

I think it would be wonderful surprise and a subtle yet telling statement if Sir Archy or the blogging cockroach showed up at Lem's place. Just to say a few words. It would not be about the controversy or an attack on anyone. It could just be about the subject of the thread.

That would accomplish several things.

It would be comment on the fact that the new blog could be a pleasant place to be without the drama and hate spewed by the Evil Blogger Lady and Chance.

It would be both sublte and sublime.

It would be great for all of us who miss them and would love to get a chance to hear from them.

Just a thought.

I think it is an interesting "Topick."