I took in a new line for the store.

I think it will be popular with all the hipsters.

Gratuitous bathtub photo: Sarah Jessica Horseface edition.

We haven't heard from Sarah in a while so it was nice of her to sent this gratuitous bathtub photo.

No wonder Matthew Broderick is so sad all the time.

Why am I the go to guy for Sarah Jessica Parker jokes

I mean seriously? Is it that hard to come up with one? They write themselves.

Commentor Memories Number 178 Palladian meets a celebrity

He has been hiding out in an undisclosed location in Pennsylvania and doesn't want to be disturbed. But he did want to share his recent encounter with a big celebrity at the local winery.

He never thought that he was going to meet Sarah Jessica Parker in person!

(He has been picking up a few gigs as an Elvis impersonator)

Even Hop Sing thinks she is an ugly bitch!

I mean he and the rest of the chinks think she is a demon faced twat!

You would think with all the time he spent on the Ponderosa he would be used to a horse-faced bitch!

You never know who you will run into in the Hamptons.

So I wasn't so surprised to run into Sarah Jessica Parker.

Horse Porn?

Sarah Jessica Horseface has been pegged to play Gloria Steinem in the Linda Lovelace biopic starring the girl from the Abba movie and the Mormon TV series. She picked the little filly when Demi Moore dropped out because she got sick after smoking horse tranquilizers.

Wait a minute! Maybe Sarah Jessica Horseface gave he the stuff. Yeah that explains. I don't see how else she could get a job.

Until they make the Secretariat Movie.

Titus stick to the loaves or don't the loaves stick to you or something!

Titus said...

Debra Messing is beautiful but no Sarah Jessica Parker though, who i believe is the most beautiful woman in the world. And what a body and an amazing role model for young girls everywhere.

Dude!!!!

Please!!!!!

Example number 1,946,572 why gay guys should not be involved in the fashion business.

Please. Stop the madness.

Don't be a Neigh Sayer!

Sixty Grit says not to be a "neigh sayer" but how can you help it when Sarah Jessica Horseface is involved.

I am mean really....WTF.

Bewitched, Bothered and Bewildered

"Well Samatha I would like you to....hiicup....meet my finance"

"Nice to meet you my dear....errr what's your name?"

"Sarah Jessica Parker."

"Yes I brought her back to the 1960's from the future. Isn't she swell?"

"How nice. So where did you crazy kids meet."

"At the track of course."

"Naturally."

Who do you think you are?

For those of you who missed that new show that traces the family history of celebrities, you should know that they are repeating the pilot with Sarah Jessica Horseface.

Did you know her great grandmother came from the Shetland Islands?

Who do you think you are?

Have you seen the new show called "Who do you think you are?"

It's about celebrities who search the genealogical records to trace their families.

I skipped the first one about Sarah Jessica Horseface since they ignored the fact that she is a direct descendant of Man of War.

But the new one this week is very interesting. They traced back the ancestors of Oscar Gamble.

This is Thomas Whyte who was the slave owner who owned Oscar's great grandmother.

Hey that poll has been up forever! WTF!!!!

Sorry but I was too busy. Anyway the results of the "What you won't eat poll" is predictable. Sarah Jessica Horseface won again! The results:

Sarah Jessica Parker 16
Rocky Mountain Oysters 5
Pickled Pigs Feet 5
Roast Guinea Pig 3
Liver and Onions 1

So that's that!

Hey let's start some trouble with our next poll!

Yeah that's the ticket.

That's the most disgusting thing I ever saw! I would never eat that!

Hey our new poll is which is the most disgusting thing that you would never eat. Ever. Foul. Nasty. Icky.

Your choices:

Liver and Onions

Pickled Pigs Feet

Peruvian Guinea Pig

Rocky Mountain Oysters

Sarah Jessica Parker

Remember vote for the worst.

Some people think that Sarah Jessica Parker is cute!

Some people are stupid!

Hey did you see what Sarah Jessica Parker wore to the Emmy's?

It was tree-mend-ous!!!!!!!!!

Congratulations to the little filly!

New York Post Page Six June 24, 2009

THESE two are better than a pair of Manolos! Sarah Jessica Parker's surrogate gave birth to twin girls, reps said yesterday. Parker and Matthew Broderick, who wed in 1997, conceived James Wilkie, 6, but had no luck getting pregnant again. The twins, Marion Loretta Elwell and Tabitha Hodge, were born Monday at East Ohio Regional Hospital, each weighing about 6 pounds. "The babies are doing beautifully and the entire family is over the moon," a rep for the couple said. Surrogate Michelle Ross, 26, was also doing well.

Congratulations and best wishes.

Hold your horses, so to speak

New York Daily News, June 18, 2009

Sarah Jessica Horseface has found herself in the midst of a real-life crime story.
Two police chiefs are under investigation for allegedly breaking into the Martins Ferry, Ohio, home of SJP's surrogate in an attempt to dig up dirt they hoped to sell to the tabloids. The woman is scheduled to give birth to twin girls for Parker and husband Matthew Broderick in mid-July.

Local TV station WTRF claims that Martins Ferry Police Chief Barry Carpenter and Bridgeport Police Chief Chad DoJack sealed a big-bucks deal with a reporter to burglarize the surrogate's house and gather information for a magazine exposé.

Reportedly, the burglars were sent to the house to hunt for voice-mail messages the "Sex and the City" star had left her surrogate, although it isn't clear whether any information was gleaned. The surrogate had temporarily moved out because of similar break-ins.

Although law enforcement sources tell TMZ.com that the cops have hard evidence against the police chiefs under investigation, Carpenter denies all involvement. "I'm 100% innocent in this, and my department is as well," he said Wednesday.

Parker and Broderick, meanwhile, are sure to be furious at the violation of their surrogate's privacy - one that follows several others.

"The most unsavory of things have been done," Parker has said. "She's had her phone hacked, her personal computer information hacked, she's had threats against her and true harassment. ... There's simply no excuse for doing this to somebody. It's not acceptable. I am incredibly outraged by the sort of extraordinary and unprecedented invasion of her privacy."

Since the case is being scrutinized by the Ohio Bureau of Criminal Investigation, it's only natural that Parker and her husband can reveal little about the reports.

In a statement, Broderick's rep simply said, "Matthew and Sarah Jessica have complete faith in the legal system. But because it's a criminal investigation, we will not be making any more comment. What I can say is the entire family looks forward to the healthy delivery of their daughters later this summer.

It has been a stress full time for the surrogate who was able to complete the Kentucky Derby but was forced to withdraw from the Preakness and the Belmont Stakes due to morning sickness and stress related issues.

Hey stop horsing around!!!

I can't take all this horsing around. Paddy's Day is over and we have to get serious. It's hump day we don't want to see horse face shanks that we don't want to hump. Just sayn'

Of course, of horse.

Miranda Hobbes: Is it just me or is Valentine's Day on steroids this year?

Carrie Bradshaw: No it's the same, we just played for the other team.

Miranda Hobbes: Oh I thought you were on lasix.

Carrie Bradshaw: What's that?

Miranda Hobbes: That's what they give thoroughbreds you horsefaced twat.

Carrie Bradshaw: Calm down you Oscar Gamble bush dyke.

Miranda Hobbes: You know you should be nicer if ever want to be Mrs. Ed.

Carrie Bradshaw: What do I care? I will always have Titus. That's all I will ever need.

Miranda Hobbes: Check please.

(Sex in the City, 2008)