Well it is not actually Shark Week. It is birthday week. Every year at this time the wife celebrates Birthday week and your intrepid correspondent has to come up with new and novel and cool ways to celebrate the most important birthday since the one where those three wise guys showed up to celebrate. Let me tell you it is a challenge.
Anyhoo I decided we would do Broadway since she loves the theatre. Now I know that you can almost allways get great seats the dayo of the show if you just walk up to the box office. You see all of the cast and crew who work there get a certain number of seats that they control. So if they don't use them they release them the day of the performance. And if you go on an off day like a Tuesday there are always great seats. So we took a cab into the city and got two great aisle seats and we good to go. But we had two hours before the show and that's where I got in trouble. We were good to go but I didn't really want to go where we went but what are you gonna do?
We jumped in a cab and went over to Saks Fifth Avenue as a sort of busman's holiday. We wanted to check out Salon Z which is the most well known Plus size section in the city. You see Saks is really a main part of our competition. When somebody wants a fancy dress in plus they go to Saks first and if they are not happy they often come to check us out. And I can see why.
First of all the section is pitifully small. They only carried a few designers and their stuff was really old lady to the max. Which is fine but they really didn't have any variety. They had Maria Rinaldi and Lafayette 148 and a shitload of Eileen Fisher. We can beat their ass with no problem. Our new party dresses will knock their balls off. So to speak.
So after that I really got in trouble. We went to the fuckin shoe department. Guys don't let your girls got to the shoe department. Especially a fancy expensive shoe department. Most of the shoes there cost more than my car. Luckily we were time constrained and the wife only got one pair of Chanel shoes that cost about as much as a small countries GNP. Jeeeez.
Then we had to hustle to make the curtain which we did. The show was fun but let me tell you something. It was really gay. Not that there's anything wrong with that. But it was a lot different then the movie. And gayer than Titus, Palladian and Jason (the commenter) in a hot tub on Halloween. Just sayn. The gang stuff was kind of silly. And the dialouge. Lot's of daddio and cool man and buddy boy and fifties slang. It proably sounded a lot like pillow talk at the blogger ladies house. Some of it was in Spanish which was an interesting twist. All in all we enjoyed it a lot even though some of it is pretty silly.
One funny circumstance is that I spotted of the ushers who is a customer in the store. I waved and called her over but she had no idea who we were until she got right up to us. Then she started laughing. What's comical is that we run into a customer almost every place we go.
So once the show was over we went to our new favorite restuarant Bistecca Fiorentina the Tuscan steak house. The porterhouse was superb as usual and the fun part is that the guys brought out a tartuffo with a candle in it to sing Happy Birthday. The wife eats that up with a spoon. The singing. Not just the tartuffo.
So all in all it was a good start to birthday week. But I still have a lot of work in front of me.
