"Hadleman, Hadleman get your faggot ass out of the hot tub and get in here."
"Yessir. What can I do sir?"
"We are going to have to work on our enemies list. So get out a paper and a pencil and lets get to work."
"Ready chief. Shoot."
"All right first of all we have to put on the list anyone who doesn't exactly think like me."
"That's a whole lot of people. It would be easier to make a list of people who already think like you. There are not that many. Maybe two. A gardener in Madison Wisconsin and a retired nurse suffering from syphilis dementia in Kenosha."
"Shut up you cock sucker. Let go forward. We have the Chemist in California."
"Check."
"The drunken private investigator who looks like Frank Cannon."
"Check."
"Sammy Davis Jr. who has stopped calling and is obsessed with cults. Imagine that prick after all the plugs I gave him."
"It's a sin sir."
"That fuckin Joan Crawford insurance stock saleslady who lives in the woods with the plumber."
"Check."
"And especially that asshole the owns that dress shop in Brooklyn."
"Right away sir."
"Pass out that list to the IRS, NSA, BTF, EPA and every other set of letters that can be used to bust their balls. I won't have anybody around who doesn't kiss my ass and agree with every fucking thing I have to say."
"Yes sir. I will get right on it. But shouldn't we have code names so the press won't know what is going on."
"Great idea. My code name will be the Travelocity Gnome."
"What about me?"
"You. I will call you edutcher. Yeah that sounds about right. Now get out of here you toady and keep your hands off the new secret service agents."
12 comments:
Your continued slander of Garden Gnomes cannot stand. Please cease and desist before you find small cement sentinels standing tall, as it were, all over your neighborhood. No one wants that.
They are my people. Solidarity!
Inga is not from Kenosha, although Daniel Travanti and Alan Ameche are. She lives somewhere in Waukesha County in what's known as lake country.
Soggy bint - where have I heard that before?
I should chirbit that script...
ndspinelli said...
[Inga] lives somewhere in Waukesha County in what's known as lake country.
Aren't she and Haz practically neighbors?
Haz is I think up near Sheboygan, ~2 hrs. away. Maybe a little less.
We'll see about that, spinelli. I'm pretty sure they both live in Walkersha County.
Same thing!
Althouse Nixon responds to Reynolds...
I am in eastern Waukesha County: Inga (if that is her real name) says she lives on a smallish lake somewhere in northwest Waukesha County (if that's where she really lives).
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Holy smokes. The meltdown continues. Yow. She simply cannot accept that others have a point of view as valid as hers.
Inga uses her full name in the comments on AA's poll. I won't repeat it here - 3 times and bam, you have some heavy shit to deal with.
Hello friends. My name is Michael and I am an addict.
Family and friends have conducted an intervention. Based on their loving but strong urging, I am going to be admitted to the Hokey Pokey Rehabilitation Center.
While I am there, I hope to turn myself around.
That's what it's all about.
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