Thursday, October 28, 2010

Marilyn's Diary


You see I was very lonely living in my Grandpa's house. He was always laying around in his coffin and wasn't any fun at all. He didn't have any time for me as he was trying to hide from the fact he was gay. I mean everyone knew he sucked blood but he tried to keep the rest of it under wraps. Until he couldn't take it anymore and moved to Greenwich Village and marched in all the parades. I was proud of him. Even though he never had time for me.


My cousin Eddie was a little pervert. He was always sneaking around when I was in the bathroom. But not when I was in the shower. Only when I was on the toilet. He was one little freak.


My Aunt Lily loved me but she was living in her own world. You see she had been a movie star and all she did was replay her movies and say stuff like "They had faces then. Green faces but faces still the less."


So you see the only one who had time for me was my Uncle Herman. He loved to help me. He would brush my long blond hair. He would always volunteer to wash my clothes. Especially my unmentionables. And he would always volunteer to wash my back whenever I wanted to take a bath. He was good that way.

3 comments:

Titus said...

I always thought she was beautiful but I had a soft heart for Lily when I was little mo. I used to put my moms scarves on my head and pretend I was Mrs. Munster.

Is she still alive and what does she look like? Marilyn, that is, not Lily.

Titus said...

Oh and work it San Francisco Giants.

Titus said...

FYI-did you know there were two Marilyn Munsters?

Kind of like Darren from Bewitched. Darren the fag and Darren the loser in later life.