Eddie Curry: Davie?
Dave the limo driver: Yes'm.
Eddie Curry: You're my best friend.
Dave the limo driver: No, go on Eddie.
Eddie Curry: No, really, you are... [Takes Davie's hand]
Eddie Curry: You are.
Dave the limo driver: Yes'm. So where am I driving you?
Eddie Curry: To the NBA draft Eddie. The Knick’s look like they are going to make a trade and get Darko Milicic and I need to show my face.
Dave the limo driver: I thought all the guys on the Knicks were darkies except for David Lee.
Dave the limo driver: I thought all the guys on the Knicks were darkies except for David Lee.
Eddie Curry: Racial humor Davie? Racial humor? You know Jayson Williams needs a ride to the insane asylum maybe I can send you down there with the limo.
Dave the limo driver: I’m sorry Eddie I was just joking around. You seem very sad today.
Dave the limo driver: I’m sorry Eddie I was just joking around. You seem very sad today.
Eddie Curry: Yeah I am. One of my famous celebrity friends died. Someone very dear to my heart. You know I first out about love from them back in the day.
Dave the limo driver: What you banged Farrah Fawcett?
Eddie Curry: No you big dummy she was icky.
Dave the limo driver: What you banged Farrah Fawcett?
Eddie Curry: No you big dummy she was icky.
Dave the limo driver: Don’t tell me….Ed McMahon….wow!
Eddie Curry: NO YOU MORON. Ed McMahon what are you stoned.
Dave the limo driver: Well sorry but that’s who just went toes up.
Eddie Curry: No. You see when I was a young ten year old kid I went to a lot of basketball camps. Then Coach Valvano took us to this big house with circus rides and monkeys and everything. And I got to meet Michael Jackson.
Dave the limo driver: Holy cow Eddie I didn’t know you knew the King of Pop.
Dave the limo driver: Well sorry but that’s who just went toes up.
Eddie Curry: No. You see when I was a young ten year old kid I went to a lot of basketball camps. Then Coach Valvano took us to this big house with circus rides and monkeys and everything. And I got to meet Michael Jackson.
Dave the limo driver: Holy cow Eddie I didn’t know you knew the King of Pop.
Eddie Curry: Yeah we even slept over. Me and Jamal Crawford. But it was funny. For the King of Pop he had really bad soda pop. He gave a can of Mountain Dew that made me really sleepy and the next thing you know I woke up with my underwear on backwards and a fondness for Abba. Ever since then Mountain Dew has made my ass sore. I wonder what that was all about. But Michael let me drive his car in the driveway. That was really exciting. You know what else would be exciting Davie?
Dave the limo driver: What’s that Eddie?
Eddie Curry: Touch it Davie. Like it’s Human Nature. Why, Why, Does He Do Me That Way?
Dave the limo driver: What’s that Eddie?
Eddie Curry: Touch it Davie. Like it’s Human Nature. Why, Why, Does He Do Me That Way?
(Driving Eddie Curry, 2009)
8 comments:
Boy, I'm tellin' ya.
I leave town for a few days and look what happens. Ed McMahon dies, then Farah Fawcett, then Jacko.
Then the sooper geniuses who run the gummint get all horny about Cap and Trade, a piece of shit legislation package that does nothing but divert cash from where it will do some good into campaign funding coffers for the mopes that vote for this miserable bill.
Meahwhile, I'm in northern BC, near the Yukon, where ther is a new oil patch every thousand meters. I've been to the oil wells - they're clean, neat, no pollution anywhere.
Employment is going gqngbusters here. New businesses, full motels, new homes being built.
Even the Canadian government, for heavens sake, has figured out that energy production is a good thing.
Jeez. We're dumber than Caunckistan. Ouch.
I better not take any more vacations. It's not good for the counrty and the body count is too high.
Hey, thanks for reading my blog, y'all.
Checking in from Jackson Hole, Wyoming, where the mosquitos are big as hummingbirds. And I've got the bumps all over my head and neck to prove it! Over and out.
P.S. Yes, people are dying all over the place and who gives a crap. I'm still alive!
Even the Canadian government, for heavens sake, has figured out that energy production is a good thing.
Looking forward to observations comparing oil wells in Canada vs those you will see in Alaska (and a like comparison of McDonalds too).
Hey I hope it wasn't only oil that was getting drilled on your vacation if you know what I mean?
And Michael, your blog is more and interesting in a week than a lot of others are for a freakin year.
I can't believe there are MJ jokes I hadn't heard, but there are. Lot of material, no?
@Chickenlittle - I'm wroking on the Mcdonalds thing. So far, the Canadians are winning. Better menu, fewer playrooms, a fireplace in every restaurant.
They still call french fries, french fries thjough. I expected at least pommes frites.
Oh yeah, east indians own all the gas stations here, too. And they hire tatooed, pierced slacker white kids to run the register. Just like home.
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