Saturday, April 3, 2010

Nasty Nellie


Nellie Oleson: Hello, Laura.
Laura: Hi, Nellie.
Nellie Oleson: Willie told me all about your class project. How's yours coming?
Laura: I haven't started it yet.
Nellie Oleson: I see. It must be very hard tracing all your relatives. Names and everything. Have to spend all that time in the forest or wherever it is you're from.
Laura: It's called the Big Woods and I'll manage thank you.
Nellie Oleson: You know the Oleson family goes all the way back to royalty. We come from heads of state and titles for most of my relatives.
Laura: Like Nero and Ivan the Terrible?
Nellie Oleson: You are so funny Laura. Say does your daddy still wet the bed? I heard he used too live with his big fat gay brother with no teeth and a chinaman. Is that true or just another lie?
(Laura kicks Nellie in the twat and walks away)
Nellie Oleson: I'll fix her. You'll see.

9 comments:

Titus said...

The actress who played Nellie is a big fag hag.

Just sayin.

Titus said...

Lady Gaga and Anne Hathaway are big fruit flies too.

Titus said...

I just jerked off to "amateur" porno website.

That is rare for me.

Are they really "amateurs"?

They certainly know how to take a dick.

They are supposed to be straight too. I am not buying it. They can take the dick all the way to the base both orally and anally. I can't do anything like that with a dick and I am a mo. I can barely get my mouth around the head and forget about anal.

Titus said...

They also show the "straights" throwing a football so as to not get our gaydar up. Those porn people know all the tricks to draw us in.

They do throw straight though so I am really perplexed.

Trooper York said...

Whoa Nellie!

I never knew Nellie Olsen could inspire Titus to such a degree.

I'm Full of Soup said...

No beer will be sold at Yankees game this year! Why? Because they lost the opener...nyuk nyuk nyuk.

Michael Haz said...

Sometimes I think that Titus is actually EBL.

chickelit said...

Titus is warped pretty tight pretty tight on Althouse tonight.
I wonder if Penny dumped him or something.

Titus said...

Who's EBL and how to put my picture on the internets?