A Man Needs a Maid (Again)

So yesterday was a disaster. We have been without cleaning help for about two months. The store is being cleaned by the employees who don't do the deep cleaning job that you need. They vacum and dust but no mopping of deep cleaning where you move all the racks and stuff. Plus we have no one for the house and that sucks. Usually we spend one of our "day's off" fabric shopping or going to the factory so the other "day off" we were cleaning the house. Normally we are so exhausted that it is really hard to get everything done right.

A couple of weeks ago I got a call from a cleaning company called "Capital Contractors." They do business cleaning and when I talked to them they said they would do residential cleaning as well. The girl who followed up made an appointment and came to the store and the house to assess the job. Then set up another appointment for the "cleaning supervisors" to come and assess the job. Now on the day that was supposed to happen she was two hours late and I dealt with the two supervisors. That gave me a bad feeling. So I did not sign the contract. Then I went to the store yesterday for the first cleaning day. What a fiasco.

They send two people to do the job. A worker and a "Field Supervisor." They said they had to come at 9AM which sucks because we open at noon. But I got there early. They were 45 minutes late.

The original Supervisor  was there and made the introductions and sort of went over the job with them. He was a speedy Gonzalez Puerto Rican guy. Lot's of energy. The two they left not so much. The "Field Supervisor" was this chocolate pudding Luther Vandross motherfucker who didn't know how to clean his own balls. When he got up on the ladder to clean the chandeliers I thought he was going to swing on them and bat at bi-planes and shit instead of cleaning them. He had no idea what the fuck he was doing. I had to go get a bucket of water and soap and give him a rag. Then he started spinning it to clean the back side. Dude that was how the Mexican maid got it to fall out of the ceiling the last time. Get down and move the fucking ladder. I had to supervise the whole thing even though they called every other douchenozzle a supervisor.

The other worker was a lady who was working mostly in the back. She was supposed to give the bathroom a good cleaning. So when I went back there I had a look because I knew exactly what Lisa would do. There was a candle on the back of the sink in the corner. I picked it up. There was a ring on the surface which meant that this bitch did not pick it up. I showed it to her and she cleaned it without comment. Except rolling her eyes like I asked her to birth a baby or something like that there. I think what she was really doing most of the time was this:

You see what they didn't realize is that Lisa was at home watching this on the camera and calling me on the phone and yelling at me to yell at them. While taking screen shots of the bullshit going on. So I had to tell them and worse show them what to do. So I was moving racks and Lisa would call on the phone and yell at me for moving racks because of my heart condition. So I got it from both ends.

I am having them come Monday to clean the yard because I really need that but once that is done and over I am telling them that their services are not required. When they ask me why I am just going to show them this: