Diamonds are a girls best friend

Toot’s Shors Saloon, May 5, 1967
Toots: Hey Joe, great to see you. I haven’t seen you much since Marilyn passed. But man those Mr. Coffee commercials are great.
Joe DiMaggio:
Toots: Hey there is someone I want you to meet. Xavier is here with his new Chiquita (walks Joe over to a banquet where Xavier Cugat is sitting with his young fiancé Charo) Hey X man, I want you to met Joltin Joe DiMaggio the greatest baseball player there ever was…Joe this is Xavier Cugat the best Latin band leader since Ricky Ricardo went Hollywood….and his fiancé….what’s your name baby?
Charo: (in a breathy sexy voice) Bueno Jose. Me nombre is María del Rosario Pilar Martínez Molina Baeza. But you can all me Charo. Nice to meet chu (She stands up and extends her hand shyly and shakes with Joe)
Joe DiMaggio: (Shakes with Charo and Xavier Cugat who grunts behind his dark glasses as Joe stands awkwardly, putting his hands in his pocket)
Toots: Hey lets siddown and have a couple of pops.
Charo: Bueno. (Charo sits down opposite Joe, and as she does her legs are slightly open. She is not wearing any underwear) Senor Jose I remember when I was a little girl living in a small fishing village in Spain. My old grandfather used to take me out in his boat on the sea and he would often say to me “Think of the great Dimaggio.”
Joe DiMaggio:
Charo: You do not speak very much do you Jose. Neither does my husband but that is because he does not speaka the English the way I do. Es verdard Xavier?
Xavier Cugat:
Joe DiMaggio:
Charo: So Joe you are the greatest ball player in the United States. Muy bueno. I am the best ball player in Espana. Can I play with your balls Joe?
Toots Shor: Blleeaaaahhhh (spits out his drink he’s laughing so hard)
Charo: I bet I can fit both of them in my mouth at the same time.
Joe DiMaggio:
Charo: I like the strong silent type. Cootchie-coothie.