Hey they took the Mo out of Motown

So it was Mo-town night and the biggest Mo of them all decided to mix it up. But later for that.

First up Matt the Piano guy did some Marvin Gaye and he did really well. I didn’t know he had the chops for this but it was right in his wheelhouse. Slightly derivative but still really good. In retrospect the second best performance of the night.

Next up is Zach’s boy Chris with a guitar and a version of “How sweet it is to be loved by you.” I bet Zach was singing along with it as he sends Chris flattering emails and posts mash notes in his blog. But hey you never know, it worked for Meade.

Then the blind piano guy comes out and plays from the piano a version of “You can’t hurry Love.” They can’t hurry fast enough to get rid of this douche. Everything he sings is like the Christopher Cross version and that sucks with a Motown Classic. I know why the judges aren’t thrashing him yet; I mean the guy is blind. He had to be to wear those fucking pink pants. He looks like the Patrick from Sponge Bob square pants. Oh and the part where Paula goes under the desk and pulls out crayons and a coloring book for Simon are as lame as the pants. Jeeez.

Megan the hippie disaster is up and absolutely murders “For Once in My Life.” Hey babe for once in your life shut the fuck up and go away. If there is a merciful God he will smite her and send her away this week. She is utterly and irredeemably horrible. The judges just went off on her and you could see she was ready to cry. Tough shit. You can’t tug the heart strings when you got a blind dude and the dead wife guy going for that demographic. So get gone already bitch and go get some more tats why don’t you?

Just before Anup came on I told my wife he should sing “Ooh Baby” and then he did. She started throwing cheese doodles at me. I didn’t know he would but it was the perfect song for him and he did a great job. Free refills in every 7-11 here in America baby.

The oil rigger guy is up next and butchers “Ain’t to Proud to Beg.” He was so sick he didn’t go and the road trip and he basically sucked. Simon flat out told him he can’t win and he kind of agreed with him. But what the fuck it’s better then working in the oilfield and maybe he can parley into a career ya know. People have done well with very little talent. I mean how else do you explain Lindsey Lohan?

Next up Lil Rounds shouts her way through “Heat Wave.” I was sure she was going to do some Aretha. I mean “Chain of Fools” or “Natural Woman” or “Respect” would have been a show stopper. She got some pretty tough criticism from the judges. I mean Motown should have been her chance to shine. I think she will be all right but she should have done better.

Next up is perhaps the best performance I have ever seen on American Idol. Adam does Motown and drops his Moness. He spiffs up in a suit and a slicked back haircut and looks all the world like Kurt Russell. He is in a suit and does an “Unplugged” version of “Tracks of my Tears” with a great solo guitar accompaniment. That dude can play. And that dude can sing. All I can say that this is the first song from Idol I ever down loaded for my store Ipod. He looks like a sure fire winner after that performance.

Then it is dead wife guy in a way anti-climatic song. It is “Get Ready” and what he does is totally dis Smokey Robinson who is the mentor this week. Smokey tells him to sing it one way and he totally does it another. I think this guy is too full of himself and is cruising for a fall. I just hope that they don’t use a bring back on him when he goes. It won’t be this week but I hope it is soon.

Then little Allison ends it with an awesome version of “Poppa was a Rolling Stone.” She has a strange Dusty Springfield vibe to her. She is my pick to win it all and kept pace this week.

My prediction the final two are blind guy and tattoo girl. And tattoo girl goes down. Which will be the only way she will ever have a career in show business. So she might as well start practicing.