(Captain James T. Kirk opens up his computer and a mound of inane comments and meaningless tripe falls out and covers the entire room almost to his neck)
James T. Kirk: SPOCK! WHAT IS GOING ON HERE!
Spock: It appears that your computer has been infected and overrun by twitters.
Dr. Leonard McCoy: What in blue blazes is a twitter!
Spock: It was a primitive form of communication in the early twenty first century normally engaged in by adolescent boys in the basement of their parent’s homes.
James T. Kirk: But how did it multiply so and why are there so many of them in my computer.
Spock: Logically Captain it would flow that stupid mutates and grows in a geometric pattern. One inane supercilious comment breeds another until we are inundated with the moronic musings of undeveloped minds. It was quite a problem at one time.
James T. Kirk: How do we control this mess? Boner.
Dr. Leonard McCoy: That Bones how many times do I have to tell you? Damn it Jim I’m a Doctor not an editor. I don’t know how to stem this tide of babble.
Spock: One would hope that eventually the people indulging in would grow up and want to communicate in full sentences and paragraphs. But it seems that each twitter is born pregnant and will give birth to more insipid twaddle. That’s the trouble with twitter.
James T Kirk: Well I don't know how I going to sovle this but the first thing we are going to do is arrest Patty Duke's father.
Dr. Leonard McCoy: WTF.
(Star Trek, The Trouble with Twitter, Season 2 episode 12)
24 comments:
I saw part of an old epidode of Gunsmoke yesterday.
William Shatner was the villian.
I know it was him in 5 seconds.
Amazing to watch a man chew the scenery in the middle of a desert.
And not get sand in his mouth!
I can proudly say that I have no idea what twitter is. I guess that it is some kind of chain letter texting.
The very thought is repugnant.
It is not that I am a Luddite, but I do not see anything interesting in texting or really talking on the phone with more than a few people I care about.
I guess my phone is a tool I grudgingly use, not a lifestye.
Trey
If I were a blogger, I'd resent Twitter too. But for those of us who can not write a coherent paragraph or who lack creativity and depth, it's kind of useful and fun too.
The episode of Gunsmoke I love the most doesn't even have Matt or Kitty or Doc in it. It stars Buddy Ebsen as an old mountain man whose daughter or granddaughter or somethings gets raped by a bunch of gunslingers. Newly is in charge and goes after them But Buddy plays this guy, I think they called him Drago or something and he was supposed to be like a Jim Bridger or Kit Carson type guy. He tracks down and kills these guys one at time before Newly can show up. I think that was one of the best ones I ever saw.
Second best Gunsmoke was when Matt has a gunfight with Charles Bronsen as the bad guy. That was a half hour episode that I think was from the fifties or the very early sixties.
And of course everyone ignored the great DeForrest Kelly (Dr. McCoy) who played one of the Earps in Gunfight at OK corral. With Dennis Hopper as Billy Clanton and John Ireland as Ringo. Now that was some cool casting.
Not to hijack a thread or anything, but-
Speaking of gun smoke, I went to class here in PBC last night to get the CWP that I foolishly allow to expire while we were in the Kindom for 6 yrs.
Anyway, from Yul Brynner saying 'we deal in lead', to our current big brother in action. Here is the warning on the ammo I bought last night.
LEAD WARNING: Exposure to lead is known to cause birth defects, other reproductive harm & cancer.
Discharging firearms in poorly ventilated areas, cleaning firearms or handling ammunition may result in exposure to lead and other substances know to cause birth defects, reproductive harm and other serious physical injury. Have adequate ventilation at all times. Wash hands thoroughly after exposure.
Fuck them up the ass.
chickenlittle! lol! I think you can write and are very creative and uhh...I like Twitter. I think Trooper would be a riot posting on it.
Thanks Darcy, you're such a tweetheart.
And a good twitter string is like a good trooper thread.
LEAD WARNING: Exposure to lead is known to cause birth defects, other reproductive harm & cancer.
Ha! I saw that last time I went shootig, too! Hilarious!
Lead Warning
Just a bunch of plumbo-jumbo
Damn! I always knew bullets were dangerous for the shootee; now I find out they are dangerous fo rteh shooter as well.
Time to drag out the crossbow.
But it is a little hard to conceal.
A woman was shot with a cross bow last week in Queens.
I'm thinking Lt. Uhuru had a serious Oscar Gamble going on. Smokin' hot was she.
I'd like to radio-carbon date her enterprising ass. That's what I call evolutionary, from Betty Rubble to Uhuru.
Down godzilla, down!
OH no doubt but at that time we would have called it the Angela Davis. You see Oscar was still in the minors in 1968.
I'm pretty sure that Spock did some serious vulcanizing with McCoy. Titus would know for sure, but McCoy makes my gaydar go Beep Beep.
Spock exposed McCoy to a new world of experiences, hahahaha.
Well Mr Sulu was the one who claimed that he let them go where no man had gone before. Well where a lot of men had gone before. Not that theres anything wrong with that.
If you click on the Star Trek tag you might see some funny shit. Just sayn'
LOL from a seriously sad Twitterer.
Trooper York said...
A woman was shot with a cross bow last week in Queens.
I had nuthin' to do with it; I swear.
Hell, I couldn't find Queens on a map.
I couldn't even find a pair of Queens, and trust me, when I had three Aces I was tryin' REAL hard.
Hey!
Don't be talkin' trash 'bout Queens my boy comes from LeFrak City.
Trooper, are you maybe confusing a Gunsmoke episode with an episode of Have Gun Will Travel? You can see the latter free on the CBS website, all of the episodes, as well as the original Star Trek. The episode of HGWT I'm thinking of has Charles Bronson facing off against Paladin.
No Bob I have that episode on a VHS tape I have. I joined the Columbia Book club that would send you a tape every month with four Gunsmoke episodes on it. This one was from the first season and was a half an hour long. But Bronson was on all the Western TV shows because this was before the Magnificent Seven and the Great Escape when his career really started to take off.
I love Richard Boone though. He is a kick ass kind of guy. He was great as the bad ass dude in that movie that Paul Newman played a blue eyed indian, which I forget the name of. I think it was Hombre or something like that.
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