Tyler Perry's White House of Pain,

(Family quarters, upstairs at the White House)

Michelle Obama: (walking in back from a town hall meeting) Mama I‘m home! You can go to bed now I just want to check on the girls.

Marian Robinson (Michelle’s mom) Thank God you are home. I was so worried that you went too one of those town hall meetings. Did those crazy Republicans yell at you and the boy?
Michelle Obama: Now Mama don’t be calling him a boy. He’s the President of the United States after all.

Marian Robinson: Big deal. If you would have lay down in front of Michael Jordan’s car in the parking lot you would have gotten that big fat settlement instead of that bitch Juanita. Anyway Madea wanted to talk to you.
Michelle Obama (under her breath) Oh crap!
Marian Robinson: Madea, Madea come on out here… Michelle is home.
Madea: (rushes into the room) Michelle there you be. I was watching the TV and that nice Eskimo lady said your dumb ass husband is setting up panels to tell people how long they can live? Is that boy touched or what? Get his pale ass down here right now!

Michelle Obama (picks up phone) Hi, can you ask the President to come upstairs. Thank you.

President Barrack Obama: (Comes rushing in) Is every thing OK? Are the girls all right?

Michelle Obama: My auntie wants to talk to you.

President Barrack Obama (mutters under his breath) Oh shit. What now!

Madea: What did you say you skinny assed bean pole looking pea pie eating muthafucker?President Barrack Obama: Nothing Auntie Madea. You do know that I am President of the United States. You might show me just a little respect.

Madea: You better watch your ass you doctor dissing insurance stealing half a commie community organizer like that was a real job muthafucker.

President Barrack Obama: Now Auntie please, my plan is wonderful. It’s just like the ones they have in Sweden.
Madea: Sweden. They ain’t no black folks in Sweden you dimwitted skeleton. They ain’t people with the sugar and the rumatizzz. They only gots sweaters with reindeers on them. And herring. And Abba.
President Barack Obama: No Auntie Madea they have a fine health care system.

Madea:Then why they all be killing theyselves? The only happy Swede I knows of is Anita Ekkberg and that be because she has those great titties. What this I hear about you having panels that decide how long we gonna live? I don’t want nobody telling them to take me off the machine. I wants to be on all the machines. They can plug me into the toaster if I can live a little longer.

President Barack Obama: Those are all lies Auntie Madea. I just wanted people to get some advice when they have some tough choices. I mean look who I have to help you? Your panel has Simon Cowell, the Hoff, Sharon Osbone and Michael Vick. They will be sure to give you a fair shake.
Madea: Wait a minute. I want Paula. She has a heart. Why you be playing me like that. Iain’t listening to some pansey ass brits and a dog killer. Who the hell do you think you are telling me what to do with my health care? You don’t look like fuckin’ Marcus Welby.

President Barack Obama: I don’t have to take this from you Madea, I am the President (he rushes out of the room).

Madea: Where you going you pansy ass fool? Marian get my gat. Better yet I’m gonna take this here frying pan and I am gonna go down to the oval office and straighten his ass out. I wanna see exactly how hard headed he gonna be.