Frenchy Fuqua's Shoe Blog.

Yo, yo man wuz up you swinging cats! Damn man I been busier that Ike Turner at a hanger factory on Tina’s birthday pickin a new hanger to beat her skanky ass with. I had to go on a plane to Europe man, check that shit out. You see Frenchy lent me out to the first lady for her presentation for the Olympics and shit. You see she wanted to be taller and cooler and give off a real seventies vibe like Cleopatra Jones you see what I’m saying. So I flew over there to Copenhagen man. What a crappy joint. Man there was just a bunch of white people. What’s up with that shit. I mean some of the chicks were cute, I met this strappy pair of blonde sandals but we couldn’t get together cause we wuz busy trying to get these dudes on the committee to vote for Chi-town. I mean I knew it wasn’t gonna happen since the Brazilians had a bunch of chicks acting like David Letterman’s interns and sucking up and sucking off and all kinds of shit. So it was in the bag. Not the old bag you dig. So to speak.

Anyways Michelle got all pissed and blamed me. Claimed my heels were leaking and that’s why she smelled like fish and shit. Com’on baby you know that ain’t it. You just didn’t wash that nappy twat of yours all that often you knows what I’m saying. You wonder why Barry used a different plane. He didn’t want to feel like he was flying to Europe in the fuckin Fulton fish market for crying out loud.

So at least I got back in time to catch the games. The Giants be rolling again as they bitch slapped the Chiefs. I want to know: Where the fuck is Willie Lanier? And you know what when you come to think about it Michelle looks a hell of a lot like Otis Taylor. Except she has better guns and bigger hands. Anyway the Giants rolled all over those poor hicks and the only fly in the ointment is that Eli hurt his heel. It don’t seem so bad and he can sit out the next game against the Raiders. I mean we don’t want to take a chance that Jack Tatum might Darryl Stingley him or some shit like that. The Jints can take them with one Eli tied behind their back.

The Jets lost to the Saints if you can believe that shit. What’s up with you losing to the Saints? I mean isn’t that the team whose fans wear bags over their heads. I mean I can understand why they want to be incognito since most of the fans are lesbian English teachers and Puerto Ricans from Brooklyn so maybe they want to fly under the radar you know. Hee, hee. That Mexican kid the Jets have at quarterback better step it up next week if he wants to last cause those Jets fans are crazy.

My old team the Steelers managed to hold on against the Chargers. What a bunch of bullshit. I mean you’re the freakin Steelers for Christ’s sake. The Steel Curtain. You gonna lose to a bunch of pussies from California. Jeeez. Rostiberger better spend less time hanging out at the hotel bar with Kobe and spend more time studying the playbook. I mean I know that Terry Bradshaw didn’t have sex once during our super bowl years. He was always studying the playbook. Of course Knoll made it in the form of a coloring book so Terry could follow it but it worked you knows.

I can’t wait to see that creep Brett Farve play against his old team the Packers this Monday night. I wonder what Howard Cosell is gonna have to say! They better bring it if they have any balls. If they don’t knock him out of the game they should just hang it up. Those filthy cheese head fans will accept no less that a broken bone or two. They better step it up and kick some ass. That’s all I got to say.

Say I hope Michelle don’t want to wear me to the Grammy’s. Cause unless she stands next to Mariah Carey all night she’s gonna be busting my balls again.

Ssssshhhheeeeettttttttttt!!!!!